Sunday, October 30, 2011

Dickies

Others complained about Wal-Mart. Not Bobby: everything about that place was magic. At Wal-Mart, in a secret hidden alley that only Bobby and Department of Transportation workers know about, there are these crusty things known as Dickies. Every year, before the first day of school, Bobby’s mother would take him the 8 blocks down the street to pick out a new pair; navy, khaki, or black. This year his choice was black. His mother had tried to talk him out of it but the Nike shoes his mother had bought two days before, at half-price, matched the starched, flat, black perfectly. For eight-teen dollars, he could have a pair of pants that looked ‘right’.

The bus stop was never cool in the mornings, it was still August after all. Perhaps a little to warm to be wearing pants in a school without air conditioners but they were new. So were his shoes as he had decided to wear his old sneakers the last few weeks instead of scuffing his new ones. Everything about him smelled of acrylic, new shoe, and freshness. The kind that mixed with your new-found body odor and smelled like the cleaning supply aisle of the grocery store.

Dickies had that special something about them before you washed them. They were bullet-proof, heavily starched, and as stiff as cardboard. The kind of cardboard you made rocket ships, not forts, out of. The cardboard rubbed against your legs, which was oddly comforting. For some reason, when Bobby’s jeans rubbed against his legs, the softness felt fake and uncomfortable to be wearing.

Usually, Bobby was the only one at the bus stop but not this morning. A new kid had moved a few doors down from Bobby. He was three years younger than Bobby and his father stood with him at the bus stop. The father stood, ready for manual labor, in his t-shirt and Dickies. They were no longer crusty, but soft and fitted to his thighs as they had been his work pants for a few months; a fort against the scrapings of work. The child at his side was non-descript. Then the father farted. The non-descript child, the father, and Bobby chuckled. A few seconds later Bobby tooted and the group almost fell over laughing. The event ended quickly and Bobby would never recall the moment as a major turning point of his life. Maybe Bobby was right in thinking that the event was meaningless. Maybe he wasn't.

In less than a minute the bus pulled up and Bobby and the non-descript child boarded. Bobby would never get straight As again. He knew that even if he got straight Cs he would still be a happy human being. If he ever needed cheered up, all he need was eight-teen bucks and a local Wal-Mart.

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Orvis Outerwear

Outerwear overload? Probably. Sorry folks, but Orvis dropped their new F/W outerwear and I couldn’t help but put it up here. In past seasons it helped to be over 5’10 and athletic when it came to Orvis gear but this year much of the outerwear is offered in smalls.

They have a fair amount of Barbour in models that the states would not be familiar with; definitely a plus. They’ve also got a bunch of new leather stuff that verges on “boot-cut guy style”, so tread lightly. They’ve still got the classics there but they have so many different options, ranging from the absurd to practical, it probably doesn’t hurt to look around.


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Dakota Waxed Cotton A-2 Flight Jacket - Classic Bomber. There's nothing wrong with waxed cotton.


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Saddlemen's Trench Coat - It's got a weird beltless trench coat thing going on here and weird leather trimming around the sleeve openings. Weird.


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Ventile & Tweed Everest Jacket - This should remind you of Cabourn's Cameraman Parka. Throw some hook clasps on there and that's what you have. I'm not sure if I should be repulsed or find this coat very attractive.


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Black Watch Field Coat - Gimmick? Sure. People love this stuff.


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Barbour Landguard Jacket - First of many odd Barbour jackets; this one happens to be in wool rather than waxed cotton. Orvis is the place to get these in the States. This one is boring, I'll admit, but it fills out already gaudy outerwear wardrobes.


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Barbour Surtees Jacket - Black military jackets? More European than some would prefer; which must mean that some people would prefer it.


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Barbour Sapper Jacket - If you're avoiding hard collars. In about three coats you won't be able to distinguish one Barbour jacket from the next; it's in the details.


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Nubuck Leather Country Coat - This is a cheaper Orvis leather offering. Notice the multiple pieces that make up the arm. Does it matter? Nah, it's still dope.


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Line Pine Explorer Jacket - Compared to the first, this is Orvis' premium leather. It's a small car. Is it worth more than a small car? It's up to you and your disposable income.


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Cattlemen's Sport Jacket - Warning sign is implied. If you don't see it, reconsider your tastes. It can be worn modernly; you just have to tread very carefully.


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Barbour Wessex Jacket - This is a pretty casual Barbour jacket. It's awesome but be aware of its limitations.


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Waxed Cotton Fatigue Jacket - Prototypical Orvis mainline jacket.


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Barbour Sporting Lightweight Washable Tweed Jacket - Orvis wenting digging through Barbour's line and found some unusual stuff. Barbour - it's not just waxed jackets.


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Vintage N-1 Naval Deck Coat - Orvis is just making sure that if you can't find it at a military surplus store, you can find it at Orvis.


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Lone Pine North Fork Jacket - I'n going to go ahead and say that this is ugly. Disagree if you wish but it's still as much as a dryer.


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Schott Coach's Jacket - A coat that references the varsity jackets of old without being obnoxious? Yep, Gant and Golden Bear can make what they want but this jacket frames what you're already wearing better than the brights that those companies offer. When in doubt, go neutral.


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Taylor Supply Roosevelt Jacket - It's the first and only shawl collar coat we see Orvis offer this season. They've collaborated with Taylor Supply in the past and mean to continue.


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Waxed Cotton Anorak - This is the best looking mainline Orvis coat offered. Just don't match your khakis to it. It fits into many aesthetics and would be useful from early spring to late fall.


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Pendleton Ranch Coat - Lloyd.


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Barbour Steve McQueen Quilted Jacket - Steve McQueen jacket on a blog? Wait that means... Oh Jesus.


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Schott Waxed Cotton Toggle Jacket - Waxed cotton duffle coat? Yerp, right here folks. Schott and Orvis have been going hard.


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Peregrine Isle of Man Jacket - It's loud and obnoxious. Racin'.


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Barbour Steve McQueen Riding Jacket - "Oh Jesus" is right.


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Vanson Princeton Moto Patch Jacket - I didn't know Orvis carried the same outerwear they sell at Journeyz.


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Barbour Thetford Jacket - Quilted Barbour just through the shoulders? Another niche filled.


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Barbour Vintage International Leather Jacket - Motorcycles and Barbour.


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Barbour Sporting 3-n-1 - Gore-Tex and fleece: are we at Dick's?


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Trail Crew Jacket - The kids are smokin' pot in your woods? Bust 'em Mr. Park Ranger.


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Barbour Coquet Jacket - A Beaufort in a different outer.


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Barbour Drigg Jacket - Like a Liddesdale but even less formal. Ew.


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Barbour Porchester Leather Coat - A Beaufort in leather. Next: a Beaufort in newspaper.


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Barbour Penton Jacket - The props department called and they want their stupid jacket back.


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Vintage Washed Canyon Jacket - There are better options that are cheaper.


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Barbour Highmoor Jacket - Are we done with these variations yet? This one's a button front.


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Barbour Steve McQueen Greenham Jacket - GTBT gone OBF on y'all.


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Barbour Steve McQueen Enduro Jacket - Dammit, shoulda' saved that joke for this one.


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Barbour Derwent Jacket - This is exhausting. No one told me it would be this much work.


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Barbour Waxed Down Jacket - Beaufort in down with a hood. They're throwin' curve balls in here.


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Bison Jacket - If I weren't so cranky I'd think that this was great.


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English Shearling Jacket - Leather with hook clasps? Very cool, even after looking at 50 fucking coats.


Orvis. Their stock is huge.







Friday, October 14, 2011

Woolrich Outerwear

Where does one find meaning when, after a year of making ones bread, it turns out menswear is full of bloodthirsty vixens masquerading as gentlemen. There was a period about two years ago, where menswear had a big ol’ boner for the post-modern view on dressing. Now the sharks are in the water and the post-modernists are either in the industry or state their opinion once and then hermit themselves from criticism. I suppose there are always bigger bullies on the block.

Woolrich dropped new fall outerwear a while back. It’s not the outerwear from the lines that y’all slobber over, but practical and reasonably priced. Given the “features” (which makes it sound like they’re trying to sell a car - pockets are not the same as power windows, c’mon), it looks like Woolrich is catering to the “heritage” crew. With less velcro and plastic, the Mountain Parka and Langhorne Jacket have the signature Woolrich flannel lining the inside, 60/40 outers, and are in traditional attractive colors (not lizard green).

It used to be the case that Woolrich did not carry smalls. Someone must have been writing them emails because they do now. So if you have SBS (short body syndrome) you can enjoy Woolrich mainline too.


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I would imagine that most aren’t in the market for a new coat (probably inspired by the need for a food shield earlier this year or last) but if you still are, here you go. Don’t thank me, I really have no idea what I’m doing.

Monday, October 3, 2011

Driver IM

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Awhile back, Sam Franklin and I had a bro-down over IM (who the fuck still uses IM?). We had a discussion that I believe is warranted to appear here. Perhaps you’ll glean some form of wisdom but probably not; it’s banal natter, really.

Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:31AM:
hey you seen drive yet
John Lugg 9/22/11-2:32AM:
No, don’t spoil it.
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:32AM:
well whatever but have you seen the jacket he wears in it its so cool
John Lugg 9/22/11-2:33AM:
Yeah I’ve seen it. It is pretty cool and fits him well.
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:33AM:
well i think im going to get a jacket like that and get a scorpoin sewn on the back wouldt that be pretty cool
John Lugg 9/22/11-2:34AM:
No that would be dumb.
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:34AM:
wat you never like any of my ideas that would be soo cool and people would like me i bet that girl from accounting class would txt me back if got that jacket
John Lugg 9/22/11-2:35AM:
She would think you’re more of a dweeb than you already are.
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:35AM:
why
John Lugg 9/22/11-2:35AM:
Okay, I’m going to go on a rant.
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:35AM:
dammit
John Lugg 9/22/11-2:40AM:
People perceive what you wear. By avoiding contrivance, hopefully one can attain some sort of personal achievement of dressing like oneself. You know how in Socratic thought there are chairs and then there are images of chairs? Well, if you put on things that embody your being, hopefully you’ll be closer to that image you intend to be. The problem with wearing something like that jacket is that it embodies something other than you. So by wearing it, people will perceive you as an image of a chair. Or I suppose an image of that character. Not only would you be an image of a character which you are not but you’d be retracting from the ideal you were pursuing previously. I mean, you cannot conceptualize the character in the movie before you see the movie. So to aspire to be that character you have to change your course of direction. When a person changes their course of direction other people tend to react negatively. It’s a less than optimistic view of human nature but one can only expect the best out of people in single variable situations where reactions aren’t measured by everyone else.
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:41AM:
wat that dumb
John Lugg 9/22/11-2:43AM:
Well, people already identify the scorpion jacket with “Driver”. If you wear it, people will assume that you wish your being to be the main character from “Driver”. Unfortunately, you can only become an image of that character at very best. You don’t have the same material or immaterial background as the main character and you certainly don’t want to go around acting like you do; you drive a van.
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:44AM:
wat do you think of this junya blazer
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:44AM:
o shit dont click that link
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:44AM:
here click this
John Lugg 9/22/11-2:47AM:
So, while you may be perfectly happy wearing a costume all the time, your social relations will probably suffer. People are petty, assholes, and think being reasonable is the only way to live. While you could take the “fuck off” approach, I think lacking friends may be an issue.
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:47AM:
then i get new friends
John Lugg 9/22/11-2:48AM:
Nope. People avoid first impression weirdos like the plague.
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:48AM:
so id probably just get real depresed and eat my feelings youd probably stop being my friend even
John Lugg 9/22/11-2:49AM:
That sounds about right but I’d probably still eat lunch with you as long as you weren’t a dick.
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:49AM:
wait what about those indy boots you like how is that not a costume people associate those boots with him
John Lugg 9/22/11-3:03 AM:
That’s a legitimate point. The only difference between the scorpion bomber jacket and the indy boots is that I believe the scorpion jacket is more of a costume than the boots. I mean Superman has his ‘S’, Daredevil has his double ds (haha?), and the main character of “Driver” has his jacket. The indy boots aren’t the first thing you think of when you think of Indiana Jones, right? I mean, I think about them but that’s because I think they’re pretty cool, but the regular layman? Does he give a fuck? Probably not.
John Lugg 9/22/11-3:05AM:
I’d like this issue to be black and white but it’s really not. Basically, if you want a rule of thumb, if it has immediate character connotations it is best left for 10/31. However, I’m sure there are plenty of exceptions. What’s with rules of thumbs anyway? That stuff is best left for menswear magazines trying to convince you that it’s ok to wear sneakers with suits.
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-3:05AM:
hey when does the shamrock shak come out
John Lugg 9/22/11-3:05AM:
Like March?
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-3:05AM:
dammit wanna go to mcdonals and get rolo mcflurrys
John Lugg 9/22/11-3:05AM:
Sure.
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-3:05AM:
k ill be over in a bit
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-3:05AM:
k wish i could eat shamrock shakes and do and wear what i want and be joyful without people being sucky
John Lugg 9/22/11-3:06AM:
Same.