Love Me Tender

Another brand outta' the UK? Whatever, this brand goes hard for locomotion references. Trains? Cool in my book. I'm all for Obama's reinvest in America program as long as we get lots of cool trains. I'd pay extra taxes for that (and have less dough to blow on oxfords). However, I suggest that we should put a clause in the act requiring all new trains to get Thomas the Tank Engine faces. That way America can be just like the Island of Sodor. As it should be.








Wait, hold on. That lining? Look familiar? Yep, here. They must share mills.

Get your train on. My prediction? #trainwear2011

Emil over at Denim Debate will be trying a pair of Tenders. Excited to see the first fits.

Wankerchief

With the utilization of the internet for menswear, learning how to dress is as easy as looking up whether or not Jeanne Tripplehorn was in Waterworld or not (she is, in fact). We've learned how to tie a bow-tie, buy a suit that fits, and get great fades on a pair of selvedge denim (to non-selvedge heads, selvedge jeans are like legos. They're fun 'cause of the process). The internet is democratized style by instructing every man to rock their inner badass/womanizer. Of course, we've seen a resurgence in a number or timeless trends. One of them being the wankerchief.



Originating in England, when gentlemen were in the doghouse after too much to drink, the wankerchief was created to keep yourself clean. It should also be mentioned that the phrase, "CHECK YO' SELF" also took root here, as a reminder to your friend that he needs to clean himself before he leaves the house. No one needs to see that.



Recently, the wankerchief was reintroduced into menswear. Many place their selvedge, it shows wear better and lets people know how lived in and authentic you are, wankerchiefs in their back jean pocket (also selvedge for ultimate authentic results).



While wankerchiefs are often utilitarian, some used them for decorative purposes. Here we see Sinatra stunting the wankerchief folded in his breast pocket. Purely decorative as Frank Sinatra never had any wanking to do. He was Frank Sinatra.



Contrast Sinatra's wankerchief with the wankerchief sticking out of the back pocket of this pair of jeans. You can see it's a heavily used wankerchief. You'll get some crazy cool fades on that wankerchief in a year or two with all the use it's getting.



Here we see Will from ASW using the wankerchief decoratively. Good to know that he uses his decoratively, otherwise that would be gross. He's kinda' old.



The internet has re-popularized the wankerchief which is good news for everyone. Before you leave said wanking area, you should always use your wankerchief to "CHECK YO' SELF". I can't imagine the 90s when no young men used wankerchiefs. Barbarians.

Wankerchiefs are great for those who need to clean the spoog off themselves after making parody posts that all seem the same. It helps if you use the same words every time.

Doin' Manly Stuff in Uggs

Uggs, sensing a trend in men's boots, gives us a line for doing super manly stuff in. It's a line that I'm super excited about and I can't wait to get my hands on a pair.



The marketing campaign is quite appealing, though I can't find an ad scan. Most ads have men lounging outside, near chopped wood with the script, "It's a man thing" plastered under the model. Quite appealing, as all men like doing man things.



This picture from the Ugg website is pretty manly. Boots and chopped wood makes me feel like I have balls, and that women will desire me more.



This is a really cool model. With all that fur at the ankle opening you can do manly things like go to the mall and watch TLC.



If those first boots don't provide you with enough ankle support you can go with these. You can do even more manly things in these like bake chocolate chip cookies. But they have to be gluten free, your mother-in-law is allergic.



These slip-on driving mocs are great, just fantastic looking shoes for doing manly things while keeping it low cut. I would imagine that these are the perfect shoes for doing manly things like painting ceramics and eating veggie burgers.



If putting on a shoe is too hard for you, you can always go with a clog. I think this is the ultimate man shoe for doing manly things. The fur is still there, making sure that you stay comfy while you leave your bedroom to make hotpockets on a Wednesday afternoon. You can do every imaginable manly thing in these: listen to Meg & Dia, read the Oprah magazine, sell your Beanie Babies on ebay, and talk about your period on the internet.

This collection is the coolest thing I've seen on the blogosphere in a few months because, y'know, "it's a man thing".

Natural Selection

Natural Selection is a brand out of the UK that's selling consumers the workwear aesthetic. They've got the typicals: selvedge, workwear shirts, selvedge chinos with lots of buttons for suspenders and side cinches, three button jackets, and some graphic tees for the kids. Availability in the states? None that I found, but I'd like to take a look at it anyway... so I can complain about it.






















The most important thing about selling a workwear brand, is to make sure your model is a stoic dude. I mean, they're representing the proletariat. They're still waiting to rise up and abolish capital. Power to the people, yo.






















Pretty standard. He's a little more happy in this one. But that's because he's working with wood, and wood makes everyone happy. Look at the size of the v-patch! That dude must sweat lakes!






















"That hole in the wall? Yeah, it used to be the crematorium. The dust makes great fertilizer. You should pick up gardening, it would further push your workwear aesthetic."






















"See these chinos? They're selvedge. That means they're... that mean they're... well, they have tape... and... and I'm standing by a chair."






















I really can't lie, the stuff doesn't look terrible on the rack. The three button jacket actually looks quite scrumtuous. The washed selvedge is a no can do for me, but I'm sure some people like their denim washed out. It's not a huge collection, but it seems fairly repetitive. There's some nice stuff here, but unless the price point undercuts the competition, there's no real reason to take a look.

Budget Turtle Neck

Gap fills the affordable Turtleneck gap with this guy. $50 and you'll be looking sharp with this under a flannel shirt, tweed blazer, or suit jacket. They've got grey and black, though grey is the more versatile of the two. Of course, it's Gap, and you get what you pay for. Don't expect merino wool of Brooks Brothers or JPress quality. Gap claims it's 100 percent merino wool (which is probably true), but I'm sure it won't feel like that when you try it on. If turtlenecks aren't your game and you want to see if they can be, without dropping more than $90, this would be your best bet.