Sam Franklin for Monocle (but not really)

EDITOR’S NOTE: THE FOLLOWING ARTICLE WAS WRITTEN BY SAM FRANKLIN AND SUBMITTED TO MONOCLE. HE TALKS ABOUT BOATS. IT WAS NOT PUBLISHED.

this yacht is pretty cool ig uess it look like it could go pretty fast its white which is like the normal yacht color so its clich and stuff but one of the cooler ones i saw they were bring booze on board when i saw them from the docks and i askedd to get on but they told me to go away

it was still cool A plus

this one is more retro and stuff it looks like jay gatby would hang out all the time on it ha i would feel cool driving around on it but i never drove it cause they would not let me on baord even though i yeled and screamed from the shore what a bunk of jerks

no one likes jerks B minus cool boat though

this one was real weird they let me on for a couple bucks but then i couldnt drive even though i paid there were a bunch of old people on board

old people suck especially rich old people

i tried to get people to leave because i wanted a good review but they wouldnt go the boat was real slow to so it sucked like screw you youre wearing sandals i dont wear sandal even when i go playing in the water i only wear penny loafers

C plus because they had drinks like 7up and mountain dew other wise D minus

this one is really cool even if i didnt see it i just saw it on google images

A plus cause its cool

this one was really smelly dont buy a smelly boat like i couldnt even talk to guys the only girls i saw on board had beards and beards on girls are gross

C if you dont include the bearded girls D plus if you include the girls with beards

this boat was the most fun and the most cheap i padled out on it and i went fast even though there wasnt an engie which sucks but it was ok cause im stonrg 

then i jumped into the water which was fun cause i splahsed all the boats that got near hahahahah i got them wet buncha suckers ip retended like i was drownded

losers

A plus because its cheap and fun and you can splahs people


-(SF)