guidetobadtaste

Sam Franklin Product Reviews

2012-01-23T16:52:00.000-08:00

I AM DOING PRODUCT REVIEWS EMAIL ME IF YOU WANT ME TO DO ONE

Pictures

2012-01-22T10:19:00.000-08:00

The man sat at his computer and flipped through the images of the F/W 2012 collections that had been touted by photographers looking for marketing jobs. He selected the ones he liked and stored them in his email.

The next day he awoke. It was cold and gusty and it might have been snowing. He walked down the street smiling with his collar popped up to ward against Jack Frost, and, just like in the commericals, he walked into Kinkos. He printed the images off in large, blanket-like sizes. He carried them home, under his arm. The paper whipped in the wind and made ripping noises. The paper held. His collar kept his neck warm and reminded him to keep his head down.

The next day he awoke. It was cold and gusty and it might have been snowing. In his warm house, he picked up a blanket-sized photo of an Italian made moleskin jacket. He taped it over his naked chest. He picked up a photo of work trousers. He taped it over his naked legs. He taped a F/W 2012 scarf to his neck. He taped a pair of F/W 2012 boots to his feet. He taped a F/W hat to his head.

He walked down the street grimacing at the cold. Jack Frost blew and ripped at the paper. He was glad when he arrived at his destination. No wonder Kodak filed Chapter 11. F/W 2012 wasn’t that warm.

(capsule) Umbro

2012-01-18T17:17:00.000-08:00

In culture, there is often a need to create definition and by extension, a dichotomy. With the amateur menswear writing proliferating on the web, one could say that some of these writers hold the conception that menswear is at war with streetwear. Zealots roll out with their guns and complain about men at work with a t-shirt and AF1s and make idealistic rules for people to abide by, no exceptions (take in point Ron Paul’s scary foreign policy - yea, it sounds great but...). This conception is attributed to a rebellion against the casual friday’s and dad jeans brought on by the dot com boom.

After wandering around (capsule) NY for a while, looking at the suppliers and the buyers, I can put that dichotomy at rest in my mind after doubting it for sometime. Streetwear brands next to workwear brands next to Italian brands; the only discrimination that defines the buyers and their brands is the amount of money their customers have to spend (and in this case, a lot). Shops aren’t going to limit their supplies to a certain set of people. They want every age and taste walking into their shop as long as their customers have money to blow and are looking to find their own definition in their garments. The buyer at (capsule) wants to sell clothes to people that care about clothing (hence the price point). He/she doesn’t care if you find yourself in a preset definition like Ivy or Workwear or if you make it up as you go.

Those guys who create these “objective” rules can tell you how to dress into a certain societal role. If you want that, then they’re making your life easier. If you define yourself, then you probably already define how you dress. Preaching to the choir.

Take this example to do away with that false dichotomy, Umbro (purchased awhile back by Nike) showed their streetwear collection, 1350, at (capsule). Umbro doesn’t seem like a brand that an idealist categorizer would take to, given their casualness.

I talked with the guys about how Umbro used to make many of the youth soccer jersey that kids like me would wear on saturdays and their re-invented Rio short. The new Rio short is longer than I remember, with a coin pocket. I asked if they would ever consider shortening the inseam but they said that their consumer isn’t really looking for a shorter inseam. I found this odd as we’ve seen the typical short inseam gravitate towards short rather than long. Shorts below the knee are usually only sold to college bros and high school kids. This doesn’t seem like the inseam that the market catered to at (capsule) would pick up on. They told me their price point, which looked to be around $40. Compared to the rest of the brands at (capsule), this was cheap.

I took a look at their site when I arrived home and it explained a lot. The look book gives off a punk soccer hooligan vibe, with heavily tatooed models wearing Umbro shirts and jeans, and perhaps the line was intended for the hooligan. The price point certainly backs up this theory, as I can’t imagine a soccer hooligan (there are a few in the states - usually packed tightly in a corner of an otherwise unoccupied MLS stadium) spending more than $40 on a shirt (unless it’s a team jersey) or buying a short that has an inseam of 6”.

Does Umbro really have the exclusivity that many buyers at (capsule) are looking for? Given the internet store powered by Nike, it’s not hard to get ahold of. Buyers certainly weren’t crowding the booth when I was around. While I can appreciate what the Umbro brand is doing (turns out my little brother, a soccer hooligan, picked up some of their gear a while back), I don’t think they were in quite the right place. Umbro seems like the sort of brand that would be very successful selling to fan shops and sporting wear shops rather than many of the shops that attended (capsule). They guys at the booth had a respect for the sport and the Umbro brand and I’d hate for their product to go unappreciated.

I snapped a pic of their old Man U replica (anyone else see that own goal? Ha).

The Eternal McNairy

2012-01-12T20:06:00.002-08:00

Mark McNairy has been in full-swing for some time now. Basic blahblah bucks and classics introductions stand aside, as I’m assuming you know a general outline of his work by now. The question is: can he remain in full-swing? Can he, like he once claimed, “take it to the next level” above Ralph Lauren. Perhaps he will. We will probably see whether he can or not in the next two years. However, looking at his past work, we can see how adaptive he has been since he started at JPress and make conjectures at his ability to be beyond trends.

It should be noted that McNairy had a history before JPress. It was with Finis, a women’s sportswear line in the late 80s and early 90s. I’ve been trying to find various imagery from his time there but the internet has failed me. He showed up in a NYT piece during his period there. The article is discombobulated and makes little sense. I hope I write more clearly than Woody Hochswender but the breaks make me think the article may have been broken apart before uploaded to the internet.

In between Finis and JPress, McNairy lent his services to 68 & Brothers and SHIPS. I haven’t been able to identify any of his work for either brand (this looks highly suspicious but I’m not going to make wild claims just because there’s a SHIPS 3 button sack jacket on SF from a few years ago). Both labels are Japanese which is why in many early interviews (as in mid to late 2000s) he cites Japan as one of his primary markets. I’m sure you’ve seen some SHIPS stuff at some point. The 2011 S/S lookbook contains some shoes reminiscent of McNairy. Or perhaps more than reminiscent if you attribute the revival of the chunky leather dress shoe to McNairy. Well, him and Tricker’s and those english blokes who take shots at US menswear because we’re kinda’ flighty.

68 & Bros is more of a page out of McNairy’s book, with baggy military cargos and coaches jackets sold alongside oxfords and madras tote bags. McNairy once described his uniform as a thrifted BB oxford button down, military chinos or the like, and a pair of well-made shoes. Both 68 & Bros and SHIPS either heavily influenced McNairy or McNairy heavily influenced them. I’m guessing the latter though I will attest that the oxford/military pant/heavy shoe look is not exclusive to McNairy. [However, given his description in the 1990 article, he has been doing it for sometime].

Named the creative director at JPress in 2005, a portion of people would say that McNairy reinvigorated the brand. He took the ivy look that old men had been shopping for years, threw in the signature ‘fuck you’ and ran with it. He managed to keep the typical JPress customer (old dude) and attract new ones by going back to the basics. He continued to offer the consistency that had kept many men coming back to JPress for years and he also offered the, now cliche, old with a twist. If you noticed, he kept the JPress demand high by not over doing the production runs of the “twisted” garments, a model brands like Supreme prescribe to like Prozac. The non-staples were never on shelves long enough to cause brand stagnation because consumers liked the stuff enough to wash the slate clean every couple months.

It is fair to say that McNairy knows prep, as he name drops Ben Silver (a well kept secret or a shitty internet precense) and nails the difference between northern and southern prep in a food interview. He took this knowledge and applied it to JPress. His work at JPress appears to be much more of the old McNairy from his NC upbringing than the workwear that we've seen him occasionally produce.

While at JPress it should be mentioned that he never succumbed to the ‘skinny jean’ fever, as you notice the stuff JPress offered was never slimmed down (UO collab doesn’t count). Perhaps fit was messed with slightly, but it still resembled a sack of potatoes. McNairy, at this point in time, could be called ahead of what is now considered a trend (that is, thick shoes, heavy khakis, and oxfords).

McNairy also said, "SID MASHBURN IS A CUNT. SPREAD THE GOSPEL." on AskAndy. McNairy, a loose cannon, was probably what JPress, previously sleepy and uncharming, needed.

From here, we all know what happened, he worked with Bass, Walk-Over, Pro-Keds, Engineered Garments, launched McNairy New Amsterdam, and attained the throne of designing WWM. He made the buck really popular and started to incorporate a lot of what appears to be a streetwear/workwear hybrid into his New Amsterdam work. The buck has now attained a streetwear status as it is paired with camo cargos and chambray. Recent photos of McNairy’s work show a New Era logo hanging off of a heel of a navy buck. McNairy has taken the new project of working with Timberland and he appears poised to take Timberland boots back to the status they once held.

Will McNairy’s work get sucked into the played out? He is doing a ton of work currently and oversaturation ought to be a concern.

I think not. Here’s why.

Mark McNairy knows how to adapt to just about anything but one thing stays the same: the unique McNairy fit. He has shown himself able to do prep, workwear, streetwear, and a little bit of Anglo-Italian. Occasionally McNairy will swing to slim but he regularly keeps things mid to loose fitting. He is never skinny. He does himself and doesn’t chase trends (see his desire to bring bucks back in interviews previous to bucks actually being back via his mentioning that no one sells bucks anymore) but also knows to listen to the sales (see JPress knit ties). He is very much like the decade-crossing-hip-hop stars, even to the extent that he makes clothes that they would have worn and are wearing and will be wearing. He does himself while keeping his ear to the ground. Rappers who want to stay in the game know that adaptability and knowing their self is key. It's not about staying relevant, it's about knowing you're going to stay relevant. So does McNairy.

[See there?]

McNairy works with brands at all sorts of price points. Pro-Keds was <$100. Much of his own line is >$200. He keeps himself fresh by working with classics other than the previously transversed (see Timberland and the what I would consider new classic, New Era). Some would say that McNairy is just feeding us the same crap we were fed for the past 50 years. I believe that is culture's problem, the one where we have trouble creating new art, and not McNairy's. Bug off. He's a lot better at feeding us the same crap than many others.

[Apparently branding is OK if it's done ironically?]

If one of McNairy’s work falls into the over-done it won’t matter because his work is so spread out. Spread your cash, man. Don’t bank on one thing. McNairy plays this game well.

Sid Mashburn be damned, McNairy will be here for awhile.

[I stole these photos from everywhere. Sorry.]

Flannel Parka

2012-01-09T21:19:00.000-08:00

My favorite article of clothing that I’ve had I don’t even own any more. I started wearing it when I was four and outgrew it when I was six or so. It wasn’t my Gymboree safari vest that I loved and wore during the spring and summer, though that one was a favorite because I figured there might be a chance that an archeologist would mistake me for an assistant and pick me up in a jeep and we’d go digging for dinosaurs together. The vest had animals on it which made it less professional looking but I figured that archeologists where so concerned with dinosaurs that they wouldn’t know the difference.

Nah, my favorite article of clothing came out during the fall, when we’d go hiking and attend Jr. Park Ranger programs at the local state parks. It was a flannel parka. Not the sort of hooded button-front shirt that streetwear brands tried selling a few seasons ago, but a parka that was thick enough to keep out the drizzles that fell through the pine canopy. That parka was dope and I knew it. It was the sort of thing that you could go chasing salamanders in the stream and not worry about it getting wet or you could wear around your grandparents even if they were the type who became upset when their grandchildren dressed rattily. I spent many afternoons running through the woods with my brother in it. It was very cliché in a Watterson sort of way. Those woods are beautiful.

When playing in those woods, I always had an unspoken rule. I would never let my house out of my sight. If I could see the yard and a patch of grey siding, then we were golden, but if I couldn’t, I would become uncomfortable and retrace my steps. I was worried that I wouldn’t be able to find my house once I had lost it. I was worried that if I made it back, the house might be burnt down or mom might have disappeared. I would rediscover landmarks and find my way, nothing changed. But now I am unsure why I needed this rule. I’m pretty good at direction and usually can find my way back once I have traveled out a distance. Looking back on it, I think that rule that I kept was probably bogus. I could have gone on many more exciting adventures, discovering all sorts of cool stuff, and still managed to find my way home. Untold adventures, I suppose.

People always talk about not losing themselves and remembering where they came from. Movies are all about this lesson. I understand where these people are coming from but I think they’re at the level I was at when I was four. They tend to be reluctant to let themselves out of their sights. They lack projection. They worry that if they do project, then they won’t be able to find their way back. However, once you travel one way and you don’t like where you’re at, you can always travel back to yourself. Things might look different. The lawn might be cut or the siding may have grown moldy; but home is still there. Decay and change might have happened even if you stuck around.

You’ll find your way back. You don’t need technology to remember how to track your steps and find your landmarks, but it helps if you have a fucking awesome flannel parka on. Wish someone would make one. I’d cop. Inna’ second.

Scarf Snarf

2012-01-08T07:12:00.000-08:00

In the most recent months, I have left the complaining to others more willing to post often and to call people mean names. 'Cept this one really bothers me enough to voice an opinion.

Everyone and their mother knows this guy as that guy.

But he's most certainly not the only that guy. People less "avant-garde" (is that really what he calls his style of body adornment?) than Danny-Dan-The-Style-Man commit the same infraction. I have seen look-books and WIWT blogs commit this off-beat method of wearing a scarf.

Wearing a scarf without any sort of coat is not cheddar. The look is unfinished and results in a bizarre neck-tumor silhouette. The scarf is meant to fill the space between the overcoat lapels and a thin scarf also looks fine stuffed in the neck space of a wool suit, sportcoat, or blazer. But wearing a scarf without any sort of coat gives no set boundaries to be filled. It's like wearing a condom around the house.

While I'm not going to rip a scarf off of a non-coat wearing stranger when I see one, I would take note of this before you step outside deciding to wear a giant scarf over a shirt. You will look unfinished if you do so. If that's what you want? Fine.

Picture from TSB.

Dirty Wash

2012-01-06T14:15:00.000-08:00

Some days I want to just bury my head. I want to bury my head in a comic book. I want to bury my head in an album. I want to bury my head in a construct. I want to bury my head in a false reality where Schopenhauer was completely correct. Luckily, I’m still a student and have the opportunity to do this.

Anyway, I’ve been dealing with the problem of the dirty wash. It does some things very well. It can evoke a rainy day, a cold winter, or a bleary mood. However, it’s really hard to get a dirty wash to be a hot, sweltering day.

Gipi is fantastic at the bleary day dirty wash.

His rain and cold is driving away and covering up all that you once knew. But summer really isn’t about the sad, mourning of what is lost and what you are losing. And I’m not sure Gipi ever even attempts the mood and setting of summer.

Novgorodoff attempted something like a hot summer day dirty wash.

She never really is able to reach that warmth. She is forced to use light yellow and blue watercolor to achieve the bright morning that shows early in her book, Slow Storm.

Eisner is the obvious first choice for warm summer days shown in a dirty wash. And he does it well.

However, I still don’t think that this is what I’m looking for. When Eisner shows a summer day, it is harsh in its contrast. When the contrast appears, it’s in a light brown and a dark sepia (most of his later work was published in sepia on a tan page), two fairly soft colors, that manage to create two totally different tones; which look oddly less than soft and cause the panels to end up harsh and with an almost masculine sort of distancing. Eisner’s dirty washes portraying hot summer seem to set the groundwork for Alex Kim, Jeff Smith, and Jason whose work always has a sort of air-conditioned feel to it. These artists work completely in a hard black and a blank white. And will only submit their work to a colorist if they feel the work needs it. These stark contrasts merely imply that the sun is shining brightly and that environment definition is clear.

Heat is a problem that seems to be only solved by the characters and by absurd cartooning (cold has the same problem but snow solves it for the most part). It can be drawn into the environment, like heat coming off the blacktop shown by heat “waves”, or the can be emoted by the character, like dripping sweat. Neither of these things is inherent in the environment. If you were a realist, you would not draw wavy lines coming up from pavement or flecks of sweat as big as an eyeball falling off a person. Heat has to be shown as an exaggeration of real life.

Dirty washes, while properly conveying a drab and dreary day and impending doom, do not do a good job of conveying a hot day. Maybe some one will come along and figure a way to correctly use a dirty wash for a summer day, but I haven't seen it. Until then, I figure we must be patient until the cartooning world solves this problem (if you would even call it that as it's more of a personal desire to fit something into a place where it doesn't belong).

How does this apply to you and how you put clothes on in the morning? If you have to think about how to pull something off, maybe you should give your self more time to sort it out. Contrivance is born out of impatience. Take the time to work things out. Lay everything out in your mind, select examples, and think long and hard before you decide something is actually better.

Inclusion

2011-12-18T18:28:00.000-08:00

Usually, when I write a response, it’s a response to a response. I mean, what do I have to respond to GQ Oral History of Menswear Blogging? A silly response for a generally silly article? No thanks, I try to keep my stupid to myself.

Vanity Fair wrote a piece that pokes fun at GQ and their Oral History. The piece is warranted, as the GQ piece is most certainly a circle-jerk. But the Vanity Fair piece itself is a circle-jerk and falls short of really “sticking it to those self-aggrandizing menswear bloggers”. The “nobody cares” logic doesn’t really apply to something like menswear blogging because it’s such a small circle. The menswear community doesn’t care that it doesn’t have a large enough cultural influence to sway a monumental event as huge as Vanity Fair does - like the 2008 election (because everyone knows that Vanity Fair convinced everyone to vote for Obama). I also happen to know people who have never watched a Meryl Streep movie or a listened to a Celine Dion album. Tell that to the Vanity Fair editors.

On second thought, don’t. They’ll just use a big word and snub their aristocratic noses at those silly bourgeoisie men buying Alden’s.

Not that what I just wrote will change anyone’s mind as the minds that I am addressing don’t need to be changed. People are still hitting reblog on tumblr and menswear bloggers are still not caring about what goes on outside of their community.

Warnett did a (portion of a) post about how he disliked the GQ piece. Warnett is all about blogging for fun and being an all-star silly blogger; which I can sympathize with. But where the analysis falls short is that he appears to differentiating two different types of fun where there is no need for differentiation. Warnett is all about subjective, creative, unique fun; which is great because those are the type of people who drive industries into the future. He calls cliquey, snarky, foot-step-following blogging douchey because he sees these people as insecure and unable to find their own turf. I would agree with him that this type of blogging is not terribly creative and does not push menswear into new spaces. However, I see nothing wrong with this type of blogging as long as it does not try to exclude others. This exclusion is where Warnett gets his idea of “douchey” bloggers from. Filling your write-ups with crap may be warranted (though I probably will only look at the pictures, I like pictures) but excluding other bloggers is not.

Surprisingly, I don’t believe that it’s the bloggers who are doing the excluding, it’s geography and web publications that create barriers. Journalism and curation of menswear blogging makes blogging exclusive. It funnels people towards certain blogs. It creates “blogging dollars” that are not actually based on merit. Traffic ought to be based on things like the “quality” of the content, not your plugs from publications. Many publications are great at keeping blogging democratic and making sure that quality gets featured. Some are not. As menswear blogs get more attention, keep in mind that blogging will become more exclusive. If you were lucky enough to be featured in a publication (I know I was) remember that you must also to continue to keep menswear blogging diverse with lots of contributing members. Do your best to try and keep blogging inclusive.

(I'm sorry nothing is hyperlinked. Blogger got itself busted up.)

Gift Guide

2011-12-15T07:46:00.000-08:00

He asked and asked, and I relented. The spelling is particularly atrocious because he was excited.

Here it is:

Sam Franklin’s Gift Guide

Opening Ceremony M1 Suede Desert Boots

these bots are great stocking stuffers and boots are really great for winter because they have thick soles you can put them in a stocking

PS By Paul Smith Flower Print Shirt

i dont own any flannel just flower prints these look great under the tree and under chrismas sweaters you could also put this in a stocking andhave room for cand i threw all my flanel out

B Store Contrasting Sides Striped Shirt

this fuck shirt is a big fuck you to ever i think fuck you shirts are great im even getting a monogram fuck you on itcause bloggers

Opening Ceremony Pierce 1 Buckle Boot

aw these are soo fuking cool like lookat that buckle that buckle is soo cool and you could use thes as a stocking stuffer

Derek Rose Striped Silk Dressing Gown

you dress like a grownassmn so now you need grown ass housewear so your lovedones should buy you thisdressing gown so you can look gown as fuck and be like pimp dadyy pimp cept respectfulto women cause thats what grownas.smeen do

Albam Trail Parka

ocaots are great gift ideas because its winter and its coldoutside so everyone needs a coat cause no one remembers to saev theres from last year

Rawlings Socks

The design matrix is inspired by the history of American clothing including military, utilitarian, and outdoor living interpreted in a sophisticated metropolitan style. is recognized for its fashionable designs, quality and durability in today‘s environment, while still staying true to its DNA.

(editors note: I think he copied and pasted this last write up from somewhere. My apologies if it was you. It definitely doesn't come from a write-up about those socks.)

Hobby

2011-12-10T21:45:00.000-08:00

Problems mounted for the blogger. The December dark turned the lights out early for his windows in the basement. He struggled with the question of what to add to his gift idea post. How do you address the contradiction of ‘buying less, buying better’ and the holiday consumerism? Do you scratch your butt and hope it goes away? At the moment, the blogger chose the latter. And by that I mean he flicked through his blogroll and imbibed the syrup. After an hour of gorging himself, he sat stuffed with consumer filth, on the verge of vomiting on the floor. He was bloated and with the furnace humming on, he began to feel something similar to the meat-sweats coming on. How would he address this issue if he could not get himself beyond it?

Luckily for the blogger, the solution came to him in his sweaty, consumer, coma. When he reflected on the moment later, he would liken it to the Gospel of Matthew; when the Holy Spirit came down from heaven, crept to Mary’s bed, held her down, and stuck it in. She became pregnant with a man that would influence the thoughts of everyone in the West for the next two-thousand years. Raped by an idea, the blogger became pregnant with a solution for menswear bloggers everywhere. Blessed was he among bloggers, and blessed was the fruit of his womb.

He realized this: this sort of thing is a hobby. For those who spend hours on the internet, curiosity drove them to consume. For those of who could care less, they didn’t read his “10 Menswear Essentials” and did not care about how their jackets fit. He had been writing to the wrong audience. He wrote to those who never read when he should have been writing to those who did. The blogosphere subscribed to the philosophy ‘buying more, buying better’ and there was nothing wrong with that.

What a visionary.

Cyber Monday

2011-11-28T14:17:00.000-08:00

Gerald sat there, listening to the banging on his door. The cops wanted to ask if he had heard anything - which he had - but he’d rather not get up from where he was sitting.

He’d met the couple a few months before. Well, they hadn’t really met but he’d made eye contact with them a few times. He discussed their arrival with Annie his cat that day they arrived as he scooped her food out for her, “odd folk they are - and awfully young to be moving into an apartment complex of old folk.” The first months were great, for them at least, Gerald had been slipping at calling the Jeopardy answers for a month or two and his hands were getting too shaky to cut out cat food coupons from the paper, so for him they were bad months.

Things started to go bad when the husband started to get lots of packages. Mary, the heifer downstairs, noted it one day as Gerald was walking to the grocery to get cat food, “They’ve been arguing. I thinks it’s about the packages he’s been getting.” When Gerald came back up, he noticed packages by the couple’s door addressed for the husband.

The cops knocked on the door and one of them shouted, “Mr. Arnold? Are you there Mr. Arnold?” Gerald sat in his chair, pet his cat, and kept Jeopardy on mute. Cops had scared him since he was little and he’d rather them not hear Trebek.

Gerald had one contact with the husband before the incident. “You buy that full price?” he asked the husband as the husband picked up a package. The husband nodded a “yes”. “You went full retail, man,” Gerald said smiling, not sure of whether to condescend or to offer advice, “never go full retail.” He smiled at the husband and walked away.

Sweaty T-shirts

2011-11-15T11:20:00.000-08:00

Hot and humid days in Pennsylvania can suck. I don’t think I minded them until I was old enough to start sweating without running around. I remember wearing cheesy travel t-shirts when this was starting to occur.

My uncle would have barbeques in the early evening, which was much too early to be having them for summer. It’s still as hot at 5pm as it was at 2pm and you never have much of an appetite when you’re sweating. The back of your t-shirt would stick to your wet neck. The sun would beat down on the river in the valley and make the air muggy and thick. All I wanted to do was sit and drink water.

My uncle had a neighbor, an old man who was older than my grandparents. He was lithe and spry but couldn’t hear much of anything. His wife had passed away years before. My first memories of him are when my uncle would drive my siblings, his dog, and me over to the old man’s property in his Kubota Mule. I never saw the old man when we drove by but his property was always there. The house looked as skeletal as the barn that sat with just a few tools and a tractor inside. The old man kept his property neat and clean. The dying, rusting and moaning, old cars sat in the back in orderly rows.

My uncle was friends with the old man and would invite him over for hot and muggy barbeques that my family also attended. He’d eat a hot dog, some Middleswarth chips, and drink some IBC Cream Soda, maybe half a can.

There are magical events: these are the things that we know we’re supposed to feel a reverence for; Christmas, extra-inning home runs in October, and the birth of a new relative. They’re times you sit and try to drink life in because you want to remember everything. They’re the times where life overloads you and you want time to process the living that’s streaming past you. These events are probably not as special as we think. Everyone experiences common events, even if we experience them differently.

The old man would drive different vehicles over to my uncle’s house. When I say that my uncle was a neighbor with the old man, I mean that their property touched, not that their houses were near. One time the old man drove an old ice cream cart over. The vehicle had two wheels in the front and one in the back. It had a little fridge in the front that could be covered with a wooden door. The driver sat in the back on an uncomfortable looking seat. The vehicle looked more like an old lawn mower than an ice cream cart. The old man was quite proud that he had gotten the old thing working. If the cart was a taxpayer, it was more than old enough for Social Security.

The old man was an avid hiker and at one barbeque he invited me on a hike over a mountain and through a nearby valley that was planned for that weekend. We were inside my uncle’s house so it must have been raining. It would have smelled like dirt and lamination, if I remember correctly. It was a break from the hot and humid weather but still warm enough to sweat in a washed and worn t-shirt. The hike sounded fun so I said that I would go. A few days later we had to cancel because of the weather. I never got around to making up the hike with him. Looking back on it, I figured that we both struggled with our own immanence. He seemed to be stuck in his house of bones, surrounded by the cars gored by rust, and I was stuck in my sweaty t-shirts, clinging to my body and away from the unknown. Or, at least, that's what I thought.

Sometime later I rode over in my uncle’s Kubota Mule over to visit the old man. My grandfather was driving. This was the first time I ever saw the old man on his property. He was standing at the top of a hill that stood behind his house. From there you could see the river valley to the south and the Appalachian Plateau to the north. At the top of the hill I saw that the man was hitting golf balls. It seemed odd, with the dead, empty house staring at me, that this man was doing something unrelated to his past. He whacked golf balls into his grassy field to the west. He stopped to rest when we pulled up by him. I don’t think I’ve seen the old man since then. He may have died a few years ago.

This is the difference between magical events and magical people. This is the difference between clingy, sweaty, t-shirts and hitting golf balls while surrounded by your dying past. The past really does, after all, die after a time. You just have to ride it out like an old ice cream cart.

In defense of: 5-pocket cords and malt liquor

2011-11-09T10:38:00.000-08:00

Levis? More like...

Comparing things consumed on a fairly regular basis in such a way that it will probably change neither items consumption pattern is probably useless. Malt liquor is cheap and does the job and the same goes for 5-pocket corduroys. You’d never spend much on either as neither can be considered an essential.

5-pockets have that pop (in the sense that you can get them in really dumb colors and pretend that you’re a WASPy jackass when you wear them – in reality a WASP would never fuck with $40 pair of pants) to bring some entertainment for the week. Malt liquor is a great mid-week prospect: hopefully no one is around to judge you.

Most 5-pocket cords need a $15 alteration to bring their 17” leg opening down to 15” or 16”. Malt liquor doesn’t need anything.

Neither of these things will last you a long time.

If you’re the type who only believes in the best, cheap 5-pocket cords aren’t for you. For those who just want something to wear other than chinos, jeans, and suit pants (?) [who still wears suits?] on the super cheap, then cheap 5-pocket cords will get you ~~fucked up~~ what you want.

The 2nd Defense of New Balance and the 1st of SexySex

2011-11-03T13:23:00.000-07:00

I hurt my foot two days ago. I was running down a Pennsylvania rural road, with a steep incline. I heard a pop and now my foot hurts. Hopefully it’s nothing bad because I have NCAA Div. III regionals in a week and a half and missing that would be awful. So I’m icing and taking care of the swelling in hopes that it feels better. To help with this process, I’m exclusively wearing my New Balance 574s: it’s like wearing a pillow for your feet. I tried to wear my beater bucks but they weren’t doing it for me. As I frump around campus, my New Balances got me thinking about a previous post I did a while back. New Balances certainly have an early 90s charm to them. As the aging discovered that wearing cheap dress shoes is more uncomfortable than they remembered, New Balances certainly gained customers. As shoulders sagged so did sportcoats and as dogs replaced children, duck cloth pants replaced clean flannel trousers. Clothing of the frumpy lacked what Italian menswear has brought back: sexysex.

vagrant sneaker

Italian tailoring is a beautiful thing. When people claim that it’s a perfect blend of elegance and utility, they aren’t joking. A breathable, soft, and well-fitting blazer is easy, tasteful and is very popular among the new Anglo-Italian style overmen. The form-fitting, tapered-leg celebrates the human figure and doesn’t try to make the human body look like something it’s not. The tailoring allows men to look relaxed and natural, not stiff and artificial. Scared boys aren’t forced into a suit for alpha-males. The come-as-you-are is sexual in manner; it’s fun, loose in feeling, and doesn’t try to hide a thing. So, yes, the new tailoring is sexysex: a blend of utility and aesthetic.

The tailoring has the new balance of ideals that romantic comedies have been promoting for the past twenty years: little-thought necessary clothing balanced out by its own graceful appearance (which is similar to some compromise between two opposites that they always make in romantic comedies). Reasonable human beings will gravitate to this sort of thing. Those who take the time to learn and study the craft of dressing themselves will appear as though they care about greater things than dressing in the morning, which is a trait that is desirable in our society. Vanity is frowned upon as is dressing like a bum. However, does it not require vanity to not dress like a bum (when everyone else dresses like a bum that is)? Anglo-Italian tailoring attempts to address this problem.

I reject this balance. I am not a reasonable human being. I am a Daniel Plainview of menswear: minus the whole ‘power at all costs’ thing. I am the ‘frump’ and no tassle-loafer can change me. The idealism of frump isn’t sexy at all: it’s old and resembles a plastic trash bag. Sweaters, boots, jeans, parkas, ball-caps, and khakis float my boat. I like my blazers with lots of pockets and fitting loosely like a chore coat. I prefer loose sweater weaves to fine gauges. I like my kicks clunky and unwieldy, like John Candy in a role other than a fat man. It would seem that this style has no balance, just utility. Mister Crew posted Free & Easy scans a while back that sum just about everything up. Utility is everything, so perhaps I’m more of a Stuart Mill than a Plainview. I am the kid trucking through muck at 6:30 a.m. and I am the kid going to the rope swing on a hot summer day. I demand utility.

Mister Crew

Or is this really the case? Wouldn’t running tights and shorts serve me better than grease-stained chinos on a cold winter morning? Wouldn’t a pair of Merrel’s serve me better as shit-kickers than a pair of bucks? Ok, utility cannot be the only influence on the way I dress. Aesthetic has some play in the matter. But what’s the balance? I’d argue that on a utility and aesthetic graph, we’d see a shape very similar to an indifference curve; with Anglo-Italian tailoring being near where the curve is closest to the origin – the sexysex sweet spot. Aesthetic, such as YSL leather jackets and Prada Creepers, would be on the y-axis and utility, such as Bean Boots or Levis denim, would be on the x-axis. Your style can fall anywhere on this curve. Just know that there are opportunity costs with any movement along the line. As you get either more utilitarian or aesthetic there are diminishing returns: such that if your style attempts to become more aesthetic when it already has a steep tangent line, then to get more aesthetic you will have to give up more utility. For example, if you had a flatter tangent line and wanted to become more utilitarian, something like a cheesy hiking boot gives up a lot of aesthetic for just a little more utility when something like a pair of desert boots would suffice for your lifestyle. Of course, the indifference curve is different for each person given different lifestyles. It should be noted that the units of this curve should not be interpreted as units of aesthetic and utilitarian clothing you have. If this were so, the graph would make little sense because if you had a wardrobe full of exclusively aesthetic pieces and exclusively utilitarian pieces and wore them together then this would balance out to where Anglo-Italian tailoring now sits. Mixing random aesthetic and utilitarian pieces would certainly not occupy this spot; it would just look dumb. In short, it is your style and not your items that occupies a spot on the graph. Of course, your items do contribute to your style. The day you wear your Red Wings is a day you can’t wear your Allen Edmonds. The day you buy a coat is the day you can’t buy some jeans.

My frumpy isn’t sexy. It’s boxy and resembles Sweetums. The Heavy Duty Ivy aesthetic (though it would be closer to the utility axis rather than the aesthetic axis) is an Augustine of menswear. There’s nothing wrong with that. It’s a side effect of utility. I was attracted to false laceration as a youth anyway. I do not value the sexiness of menswear enough to give up my 574s. I enjoy the padding protecting my foot and floppy flannels that don’t hug me closely. Ties and slick blazers feel out of place in most college classes and I don’t get good enough grades to aspire to be an Anglo-Italian overman; the tailoring would be too much into my own fantastical self-reflection. Becoming oneself has influences of das Man. You must swing your balance outside of your own fantasy world and consider the world of context you have been born into. Balance the two and you’ve achieved something that I believe many of us are working towards.

I’ve identified my self with Heavy Duty Ivy but I believe that this person has not become a metaphysical ideal of my self. My self will be influenced from my inner and the outer and will change over time. This ideal of changing self (the term for this in menswear is ‘wardrobe’ which is seriously fucked up and material) is nothing new. We’ve seen it as we start as young adults in middle school, come out with a changed perspective as a grown adult, and gain a new perspective as we enter old age. I claim that your wardrobe indifference curve changes over time: you come to appreciate different things on your body. But I also claim that the collective menswear indifference curve changes over time. The point closest to the origin will change from Anglo-Italian menswear to something new and unknown over time. New overmen will appear sometime in the future to move Anglo-Italian tailoring aside as the center of the curve and replace it with a new perspective on menswear: a new set of morality.

So what did you learn from reading this? If lucky, you learned nothing.

Just for good measure: sexysex.

Dickies

2011-10-30T20:51:00.000-07:00

Others complained about Wal-Mart. Not Bobby: everything about that place was magic. At Wal-Mart, in a secret hidden alley that only Bobby and Department of Transportation workers know about, there are these crusty things known as Dickies. Every year, before the first day of school, Bobby’s mother would take him the 8 blocks down the street to pick out a new pair; navy, khaki, or black. This year his choice was black. His mother had tried to talk him out of it but the Nike shoes his mother had bought two days before, at half-price, matched the starched, flat, black perfectly. For eight-teen dollars, he could have a pair of pants that looked ‘right’.

The bus stop was never cool in the mornings, it was still August after all. Perhaps a little to warm to be wearing pants in a school without air conditioners but they were new. So were his shoes as he had decided to wear his old sneakers the last few weeks instead of scuffing his new ones. Everything about him smelled of acrylic, new shoe, and freshness. The kind that mixed with your new-found body odor and smelled like the cleaning supply aisle of the grocery store.

Dickies had that special something about them before you washed them. They were bullet-proof, heavily starched, and as stiff as cardboard. The kind of cardboard you made rocket ships, not forts, out of. The cardboard rubbed against your legs, which was oddly comforting. For some reason, when Bobby’s jeans rubbed against his legs, the softness felt fake and uncomfortable to be wearing.

Usually, Bobby was the only one at the bus stop but not this morning. A new kid had moved a few doors down from Bobby. He was three years younger than Bobby and his father stood with him at the bus stop. The father stood, ready for manual labor, in his t-shirt and Dickies. They were no longer crusty, but soft and fitted to his thighs as they had been his work pants for a few months; a fort against the scrapings of work. The child at his side was non-descript. Then the father farted. The non-descript child, the father, and Bobby chuckled. A few seconds later Bobby tooted and the group almost fell over laughing. The event ended quickly and Bobby would never recall the moment as a major turning point of his life. Maybe Bobby was right in thinking that the event was meaningless. Maybe he wasn't.

In less than a minute the bus pulled up and Bobby and the non-descript child boarded. Bobby would never get straight As again. He knew that even if he got straight Cs he would still be a happy human being. If he ever needed cheered up, all he need was eight-teen bucks and a local Wal-Mart.

Orvis Outerwear

2011-10-19T08:14:00.000-07:00

Outerwear overload? Probably. Sorry folks, but Orvis dropped their new F/W outerwear and I couldn’t help but put it up here. In past seasons it helped to be over 5’10 and athletic when it came to Orvis gear but this year much of the outerwear is offered in smalls.

They have a fair amount of Barbour in models that the states would not be familiar with; definitely a plus. They’ve also got a bunch of new leather stuff that verges on “boot-cut guy style”, so tread lightly. They’ve still got the classics there but they have so many different options, ranging from the absurd to practical, it probably doesn’t hurt to look around.

Dakota Waxed Cotton A-2 Flight Jacket - Classic Bomber. There's nothing wrong with waxed cotton.

Saddlemen's Trench Coat - It's got a weird beltless trench coat thing going on here and weird leather trimming around the sleeve openings. Weird.

Ventile & Tweed Everest Jacket - This should remind you of Cabourn's Cameraman Parka. Throw some hook clasps on there and that's what you have. I'm not sure if I should be repulsed or find this coat very attractive.

Black Watch Field Coat - Gimmick? Sure. People love this stuff.

Barbour Landguard Jacket - First of many odd Barbour jackets; this one happens to be in wool rather than waxed cotton. Orvis is the place to get these in the States. This one is boring, I'll admit, but it fills out already gaudy outerwear wardrobes.

Barbour Surtees Jacket - Black military jackets? More European than some would prefer; which must mean that some people would prefer it.

Barbour Sapper Jacket - If you're avoiding hard collars. In about three coats you won't be able to distinguish one Barbour jacket from the next; it's in the details.

Nubuck Leather Country Coat - This is a cheaper Orvis leather offering. Notice the multiple pieces that make up the arm. Does it matter? Nah, it's still dope.

Line Pine Explorer Jacket - Compared to the first, this is Orvis' premium leather. It's a small car. Is it worth more than a small car? It's up to you and your disposable income.

Cattlemen's Sport Jacket - Warning sign is implied. If you don't see it, reconsider your tastes. It can be worn modernly; you just have to tread very carefully.

Barbour Wessex Jacket - This is a pretty casual Barbour jacket. It's awesome but be aware of its limitations.

Waxed Cotton Fatigue Jacket - Prototypical Orvis mainline jacket.

Barbour Sporting Lightweight Washable Tweed Jacket - Orvis wenting digging through Barbour's line and found some unusual stuff. Barbour - it's not just waxed jackets.

Vintage N-1 Naval Deck Coat - Orvis is just making sure that if you can't find it at a military surplus store, you can find it at Orvis.

Lone Pine North Fork Jacket - I'n going to go ahead and say that this is ugly. Disagree if you wish but it's still as much as a dryer.

Schott Coach's Jacket - A coat that references the varsity jackets of old without being obnoxious? Yep, Gant and Golden Bear can make what they want but this jacket frames what you're already wearing better than the brights that those companies offer. When in doubt, go neutral.

Taylor Supply Roosevelt Jacket - It's the first and only shawl collar coat we see Orvis offer this season. They've collaborated with Taylor Supply in the past and mean to continue.

Waxed Cotton Anorak - This is the best looking mainline Orvis coat offered. Just don't match your khakis to it. It fits into many aesthetics and would be useful from early spring to late fall.

Pendleton Ranch Coat - Lloyd.

Barbour Steve McQueen Quilted Jacket - Steve McQueen jacket on a blog? Wait that means... Oh Jesus.

Schott Waxed Cotton Toggle Jacket - Waxed cotton duffle coat? Yerp, right here folks. Schott and Orvis have been going hard.

Peregrine Isle of Man Jacket - It's loud and obnoxious. Racin'.

Barbour Steve McQueen Riding Jacket - "Oh Jesus" is right.

Vanson Princeton Moto Patch Jacket - I didn't know Orvis carried the same outerwear they sell at Journeyz.

Barbour Thetford Jacket - Quilted Barbour just through the shoulders? Another niche filled.

Barbour Vintage International Leather Jacket - Motorcycles and Barbour.

Barbour Sporting 3-n-1 - Gore-Tex and fleece: are we at Dick's?

Trail Crew Jacket - The kids are smokin' pot in your woods? Bust 'em Mr. Park Ranger.

Barbour Coquet Jacket - A Beaufort in a different outer.

Barbour Drigg Jacket - Like a Liddesdale but even less formal. Ew.

Barbour Porchester Leather Coat - A Beaufort in leather. Next: a Beaufort in newspaper.

Barbour Penton Jacket - The props department called and they want their stupid jacket back.

Vintage Washed Canyon Jacket - There are better options that are cheaper.

Barbour Highmoor Jacket - Are we done with these variations yet? This one's a button front.

Barbour Steve McQueen Greenham Jacket - GTBT gone OBF on y'all.

Barbour Steve McQueen Enduro Jacket - Dammit, shoulda' saved that joke for this one.

Barbour Derwent Jacket - This is exhausting. No one told me it would be this much work.

Barbour Waxed Down Jacket - Beaufort in down with a hood. They're throwin' curve balls in here.

Bison Jacket - If I weren't so cranky I'd think that this was great.

English Shearling Jacket - Leather with hook clasps? Very cool, even after looking at 50 fucking coats.

Orvis. Their stock is huge.

Woolrich Outerwear

2011-10-14T18:00:00.000-07:00

Where does one find meaning when, after a year of making ones bread, it turns out menswear is full of bloodthirsty vixens masquerading as gentlemen. There was a period about two years ago, where menswear had a big ol’ boner for the post-modern view on dressing. Now the sharks are in the water and the post-modernists are either in the industry or state their opinion once and then hermit themselves from criticism. I suppose there are always bigger bullies on the block.

Woolrich dropped new fall outerwear a while back. It’s not the outerwear from the lines that y’all slobber over, but practical and reasonably priced. Given the “features” (which makes it sound like they’re trying to sell a car - pockets are not the same as power windows, c’mon), it looks like Woolrich is catering to the “heritage” crew. With less velcro and plastic, the Mountain Parka and Langhorne Jacket have the signature Woolrich flannel lining the inside, 60/40 outers, and are in traditional attractive colors (not lizard green).

It used to be the case that Woolrich did not carry smalls. Someone must have been writing them emails because they do now. So if you have SBS (short body syndrome) you can enjoy Woolrich mainline too.

I would imagine that most aren’t in the market for a new coat (probably inspired by the need for a food shield earlier this year or last) but if you still are, here you go. Don’t thank me, I really have no idea what I’m doing.

Driver IM

2011-10-03T08:22:00.000-07:00

Awhile back, Sam Franklin and I had a bro-down over IM (who the fuck still uses IM?). We had a discussion that I believe is warranted to appear here. Perhaps you’ll glean some form of wisdom but probably not; it’s banal natter, really.

Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:31AM:
hey you seen drive yet
John Lugg 9/22/11-2:32AM:
No, don’t spoil it.
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:32AM:
well whatever but have you seen the jacket he wears in it its so cool
John Lugg 9/22/11-2:33AM:
Yeah I’ve seen it. It is pretty cool and fits him well.
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:33AM:
well i think im going to get a jacket like that and get a scorpoin sewn on the back wouldt that be pretty cool
John Lugg 9/22/11-2:34AM:
No that would be dumb.
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:34AM:
wat you never like any of my ideas that would be soo cool and people would like me i bet that girl from accounting class would txt me back if got that jacket
John Lugg 9/22/11-2:35AM:
She would think you’re more of a dweeb than you already are.
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:35AM:
why
John Lugg 9/22/11-2:35AM:
Okay, I’m going to go on a rant.
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:35AM:
dammit
John Lugg 9/22/11-2:40AM:
People perceive what you wear. By avoiding contrivance, hopefully one can attain some sort of personal achievement of dressing like oneself. You know how in Socratic thought there are chairs and then there are images of chairs? Well, if you put on things that embody your being, hopefully you’ll be closer to that image you intend to be. The problem with wearing something like that jacket is that it embodies something other than you. So by wearing it, people will perceive you as an image of a chair. Or I suppose an image of that character. Not only would you be an image of a character which you are not but you’d be retracting from the ideal you were pursuing previously. I mean, you cannot conceptualize the character in the movie before you see the movie. So to aspire to be that character you have to change your course of direction. When a person changes their course of direction other people tend to react negatively. It’s a less than optimistic view of human nature but one can only expect the best out of people in single variable situations where reactions aren’t measured by everyone else.
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:41AM:
wat that dumb
John Lugg 9/22/11-2:43AM:
Well, people already identify the scorpion jacket with “Driver”. If you wear it, people will assume that you wish your being to be the main character from “Driver”. Unfortunately, you can only become an image of that character at very best. You don’t have the same material or immaterial background as the main character and you certainly don’t want to go around acting like you do; you drive a van.
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:44AM:
wat do you think of this junya blazer
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:44AM:
o shit dont click that link
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:44AM:
here click this
John Lugg 9/22/11-2:47AM:
So, while you may be perfectly happy wearing a costume all the time, your social relations will probably suffer. People are petty, assholes, and think being reasonable is the only way to live. While you could take the “fuck off” approach, I think lacking friends may be an issue.
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:47AM:
then i get new friends
John Lugg 9/22/11-2:48AM:
Nope. People avoid first impression weirdos like the plague.
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:48AM:
so id probably just get real depresed and eat my feelings youd probably stop being my friend even
John Lugg 9/22/11-2:49AM:
That sounds about right but I’d probably still eat lunch with you as long as you weren’t a dick.
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-2:49AM:
wait what about those indy boots you like how is that not a costume people associate those boots with him
John Lugg 9/22/11-3:03 AM:
That’s a legitimate point. The only difference between the scorpion bomber jacket and the indy boots is that I believe the scorpion jacket is more of a costume than the boots. I mean Superman has his ‘S’, Daredevil has his double ds (haha?), and the main character of “Driver” has his jacket. The indy boots aren’t the first thing you think of when you think of Indiana Jones, right? I mean, I think about them but that’s because I think they’re pretty cool, but the regular layman? Does he give a fuck? Probably not.
John Lugg 9/22/11-3:05AM:
I’d like this issue to be black and white but it’s really not. Basically, if you want a rule of thumb, if it has immediate character connotations it is best left for 10/31. However, I’m sure there are plenty of exceptions. What’s with rules of thumbs anyway? That stuff is best left for menswear magazines trying to convince you that it’s ok to wear sneakers with suits.
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-3:05AM:
hey when does the shamrock shak come out
John Lugg 9/22/11-3:05AM:
Like March?
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-3:05AM:
dammit wanna go to mcdonals and get rolo mcflurrys
John Lugg 9/22/11-3:05AM:
Sure.
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-3:05AM:
k ill be over in a bit
Sam Franklin 9/22/11-3:05AM:
k wish i could eat shamrock shakes and do and wear what i want and be joyful without people being sucky
John Lugg 9/22/11-3:06AM:
Same.

Interview: Zabou

2011-09-20T11:34:00.000-07:00

Across the sea, (beyond the sea?) the guys in Japan knew about menswear culture while we bought dragon t-shirts. Supposedly the ‘rediscoverers’ of Americana, they know their stuff as menswear is very much a hobby for them. This isn’t just a passing fad. They take their stuff seriously. You know those magazines like Free & Easy that y’all slobber over? Those remind me of the Model Railroader magazine. It’s lame to everyone else, but do you know how to make Crabbe Town look like a 1910s mining town? Neither do I. Of course, with the rise of the menswear hobby in Japan, so did menswear shops. One of them was Zabou, which isn’t so much of a historical reference as other shops in Japan. Based out of Osaka, they understand the historical context of menswear but understand that their life, which involves being active and adventuresome, simply won’t let them dress like McQueen did in “The Thomas Crowne Affair”. They keep things simple as they sell chinos, BD oxfords, sneakers, boots, and those odd bucket hats that only Asian males can look uncontrived in. You don’t see them stunting any, as some tumblr jackass who doesn’t know his foot from his face would say, T3 level sartorial shit (guys, it’s not rocket science. Stop pretending that it is). In short, Zabou makes things easy for their shoppers. Complication results in contrivance which results in frustration and a shopper that isn’t coming back.

(take note of Russel Moccasin collection for sale - extensive)

The following interview with Zabou is awkward due to a language barrier. However, these are a group of guys who enjoy what they do and know that dressing yourself isn’t serious business. If putting clothes on in the morning is serious business for you can I suggest a subscription to Model Railroader? Perhaps you will enjoy recreating a personal expression of history in your basement rather than a personal expression of history in public.

If you take anything away from this I would hope it’s their concept of Ame-cazi style. They don’t make it hard for themselves, really.

Q:
Online blog archives dates you guys to 2006, but when did Zabou officially open?

A:
June, 1997

Q:
Occasionally, you guys will post pictures of the people that influence a specific look.
Who are people that influence the Zabou look as a whole?

A:
This is a very good question. We could say that this is what we Japanese do best, which is to research and understand various "originals" from around the world, and adapt/customize them into our own ways. These "originals" range from the characters from the novels written by Hemingway, Alain Delon, to the hippies we meet at places we visit.

Q:
How has the Zabou style evolved?

A:
Zabou style is the style in which we produce relying only on our own perspectives.Judging by our fashion senses and perspectives, we choose what is cool and fashionable,and try to make it a standard. Our definition of "cool" is influenced not only by the latest trends, but also by the things that are considered universal, and are not influenced by trends. One of the objectives of the ZAbou style is to look "normal" no matter who looks at it, and to be able to adaptto various occasions. The Zabou style is based fundamentally on two main facts: we love people, and we love clothes. The fashion industry is a quickly evolving industry, with new trends and styles made every season. But even if the trends change, we will keep relying on our own perspectives.

Q:
How much are you guys influenced by American style?

A:
About 50%. As you Americans obviously know, the US has many elements in which we are inspired by. For example, the cultural difference within the country (East coast and West coast), the climate, and race are all very influential for us. The other half is from the culture and history of Europe and other regions.

Q:
Zabou is influenced by sports. What are the sorts that you guys participate in yourselves?

A:
The sports we often enjoy are jogging( I don't know if you call it a sport), biking, trekking, and snowboarding. There are many things in which we are inspired by sports. We believe that the satisfaction we get from being dressed in comfortable and well-balanced clothes is something that everyone seeks for, and we try to persue that ideology in various ways. For instance,
creating things by using newly developed fabric or materials, promoting hybrid styles produced by combining low-tech and hi-tec styles, etc. In addition, (internet) surfing is also essential for creating new styles.

Q:
If you were to hike across Japan, what are the 5 things that you would bring with you?

A:
First of all, we enjoy hiking as a tool for creating the Zabou style. We try on various clothes and gather various things, and repeat that over and over before finally deciding what we need and don't need to take with us. The five things that we would take with us to hiking, are bottled water, rice-balls( so that we don't starve to death), a cellphone, a camera, and last but not least, friends. Water is obviously for satisfying our thirst, cellphones are for gathering various information, and a camera is needed for taking pictures to post on our blog, and friends are essential for sharing those precious moments.

Q:
What is new for Zabou in the future?

A:
Our motto is "creating real gentlemen", and this is what we have been trying to accomplish ever since we began. Time goes by, but there are things that don't change, and those are the things we find important. Like how liquid changes its form depending on the type of cup it fills, we, too, have to transform ourselves and open our minds to new things, even if we have to leave behind the things we are accustomed to. That is what we do, and will keep doing in the future. To us, things like increasing the number of stores and making inroads into foreign markets, are not what we consider as our goal, but just a process for achieving our goal.

Our superiors have interpreted the casual fashion styles of the US into their own ways, and have created the style now known as "Ame-cazi" (short for American casual). They may have been wrongfully interpreted, or simply a general Japanese interpretation of America, but what is important, is finding our own individual ways under those circumstances.

Q:
Who does the Zabou team consist of?

A:
Zabou consists of 5 unique individuals.
We all love clothes, and how they characterize our individualities greatly. One of our staff members attracts various customers and predicts their tastes with his accurate sensitivity, while another staff member, having sufficient knowledge on behavioral psychology, is an expert on marketing. There are also staff members who dedicate their time researching fashion and layouts, and others who use their technological pc skills to manage our website and online store. As you can see, Zabou consists of individuals with totally different personalities.

Q:
As it becomes hotter (interview was begun in July; I’m lazy), what are the fabrics that you guys look for to help deal with temperature?

A:
In terms of fabrics that have been around since the old times, we would have to say cotton and linen. We also recommend fabrics like seersuckers and chambray for the summer. On the other hand, in terms of relatively new fabrics developed from the latest technology, cool-max and outlast are suited for hot weather. After all, whatever fabric that makes people both feel
and look nice and cool in the summer is considered appropriate.

Q:
What do you guys consider staples in a Ame-cazi wardrobe? What sorts of things are most useful in your
dress?

A:
Button-down shirts, jeans, khaki pants, and military pants are items that always come in handy for Ame-cazi fashion. We also consider canvas sneakers and suede oxford shoes standard and essential items. In our opinion, outfits have to be comfortable and simple, with basic colors. We try to carry practical items that use natural fabrics, and fabrics that show different expressions
as you wear them. We promote *hybrid and *versatile styles that combine traditional, military, work, outdoor, and sports styles.

Minimalism

2011-08-26T19:52:00.000-07:00

To quote great pieces of high school English short-story fiction containing stolen witticisms that will leave public educated and public subsidized teachers gasping for breath, “the irony was palpable”. The minimalist’s room was a mess. Pizza boxes were strewn about and grease caked on the counter. His mother would have been upset with him if she were there. Things would have been better but life happens. And by happens, I mean that life changes and typically for the worse. Previous to his fall, his life had been a grand Clamence and his briefcase had been organized. His girlfriend had left him for some sleazeball and he had tumbled. His game had fallen off the bull of life. He laid on his couch, stomach bursting, and waited for people to stop posting that prep crap on their ‘blogs’. In a few weeks, maybe months, he’d rise and start working out; he’d flex his minimalist muscles and return to his grandeur. Maybe Jil Sander would give him a call. Maybe even a ‘blogger’ would post a picture of a whole-cut, thin-lapeled cheesecake of a WIWT.

Tote Bags

2011-08-17T22:20:00.000-07:00

With the rise of Italian sportswear we’ve seen a trend die, thank goodness. Remember tote bags? Those things that you carry Fritos and LARP campaign manuals in? Yep, I haven’t seen one float across my dashboard in sometime either. I never was a particular fan of tote bags as they seem effeminate. However, Sam Franklin thinks that they are great. We recently had a debate via email over their merits.

From: stylepro138492039@hotmail.com
Sent: Tuesday, August 09, 2011 11:25 AM
To: guidetobadtaste@gmail.com

what do you think about a post about tote bags i think that they are great and very useful to carry stuff in and every man should own one as their an essential

From: guidetobadtaste@gmail.com
Sent: Tuesday, August 09, 2011 5:09 PM
To: stylepro138492039@hotmail.com

I personally think that tote bags suck. I don’t think I’m comfortable letting you post about them if I don’t actually like them.

John Lugg

From: stylepro138492039@hotmail.com
Sent: Tuesday, August 09, 2011 5:10 PM
To: guidetobadtaste@gmail.com

what you think that all my ideas suck and you never let me post about them i know about these things than you do just let me take care of it there are so many merits to tote bags why wont you see that

From: guidetobadtaste@gmail.com
Sent: Tuesday, August 09, 2011 8:22 PM
To: stylepro138492039@hotmail.com

What merits? Name them.

John Lugg

From: stylepro138492039@hotmail.com
Sent: Tuesday, August 09, 2011 8:23 PM
To: guidetobadtaste@gmail.com

you can put all sorts of stuff in them and their rugged and useful and look really cool you can fit really cool stuff like an expresso machine in them and other cool stuff like you could take them to a cool coffee place and be like im really stoic and cool im just going to pull out my old kerowack novel and read it while ppl play mellow music over a bose sound system and the coffee shop babes pour a foam heart in your drink or whatever how they do that

From: guidetobadtaste@gmail.com
Sent: Tuesday, August 09, 2011 11:59 PM
To: stylepro138492039@hotmail.com

I’ve seen you with your tote bag and there’s never anything in it.

John Lugg

From: stylepro138492039@hotmail.com
Sent: Wednesday, August 10, 2011 12:00 AM
To: guidetobadtaste@gmail.com

theier is always useful stuff in my bag i caryy lots of useful things in them

From: guidetobadtaste@gmail.com
Sent: Wednesday, August 10, 2011 8:11 AM
To: stylepro138492039@hotmail.com

Like what? Can’t you just carry a backpack or briefcase?

John Lugg

From: stylepro138492039@hotmail.com
Sent: Wednesday, August 10, 2011 8:12 AM
To: guidetobadtaste@gmail.com

useful things that dont fit in a backpack or briefcase

From: guidetobadtaste@gmail.com
Sent: Wednesday, August 10, 2011 5:39 PM
To: stylepro138492039@hotmail.com

Examples please?

John Lugg

From: stylepro138492039@hotmail.com
Sent: Wednesday, August 10, 2011 5:40 PM
To: guidetobadtaste@gmail.com

i just took a picture of my rabbit in my totebag you can carry all sorts of things in them

From: guidetobadtaste@gmail.com
Sent: Wednesday, August 10, 2011 7:19 PM
To: stylepro138492039@hotmail.com

I didn’t know you had a rabbit. Is it cute?

John Lugg

From: stylepro138492039@hotmail.com
Sent: Wednesday, August 10, 2011 7:20 PM
To: guidetobadtaste@gmail.com

yes very cute you should see it you can carry things like rabbits in tote bags

From: guidetobadtaste@gmail.com
Sent: Wednesday, August 10, 2011 9:02 PM
To: stylepro138492039@hotmail.com

So you can carry rabbits and what else?

John Lugg

From: stylepro138492039@hotmail.com
Sent: Wednesday, August 10, 2011 9:03 PM
To: guidetobadtaste@gmail.com

mom has a cat

From: guidetobadtaste@gmail.com
Sent: Wednesday, August 10, 2011 11:03 PM
To: stylepro138492039@hotmail.com

Don’t be dumb. Cats hate riding in tote bags.

John Lugg

From: stylepro138492039@hotmail.com
Sent: Wednesday, August 10, 2011 11:04 PM
To: guidetobadtaste@gmail.com

my moms cat would love riding on tote bags sometimes my mom puts her on her lap when shes driving and pretends the cat is driving its really funny but then after awhile the cat gets mad and hisses and tries to jump out the window if its down it actually happened once but we stopped the car and found the cat she was hiding in a tree and was mad at mom so i had to get her down

From: guidetobadtaste@gmail.com
Sent: Wednesday, August 10, 2011 11:34 PM
To: stylepro138492039@hotmail.com

I’m definitely not letting you write about tote bags. They’re just not that useful and look like a purse.

John Lugg

From: stylepro138492039@hotmail.com
Sent: Wednesday, August 10, 2011 11:35 PM
To: guidetobadtaste@gmail.com

want me to send you that picture of my rabbit in my tote

__________________________

So there you have it. Tote bags are great for carrying rabbits around in.

Trend Watch: Suede Patches

2011-08-15T18:21:00.000-07:00

Suede patches seem to be the alteration of choice in recent months. Brand new sweater that hasn’t seen any wear? Suede patches. Sportcoat that fits like shit that you found in a thrift store for $5 dollars too much ‘cause of the wine stains? Suede patches. Have no idea what to add to your FW ’11 collection? Suede patches. Fender bender? Suede patches. Shitty tumblr blog? Suede patches. Knees all blown out from “uh-huh you know what”? Suede patches. Shitty sandwich? Nah, no suede patches, you gotta’ go with mayo. Homeless? Suede patches might work but I’m told that a marketable skill helps much more.

Suede patches, while not always applied out of necessity, give you an authentic look that is all your own; simply because you took your stuff to the tailor and got them put on. That or you shopped at Rugby. When you walk down the street people will whistle and say, "what an original guy! I saw the same look 6 months ago but never thought I'd see it here!" Let us view how they can be best displayed.

Wow! Fantastic! Subtle contrast between the coat and patch makes sure that people can see them while at the same time aren't too loud.

This is just as good. The image describes all.

These aren't suede patches but it's still super authentic and rugged.

Once again, little to be said here.

I'm not sure why this image is here. I'll consult my intern.

With this image, some of you may be foreseeing the death of suede patches. Remember when your father started watching Japanese cartoons with you and they suddenly were no longer cool? Damn old people ruining trends that the youth come up with.

Oh wow! Suede patches are so cool that Thom Browne uses them!

UH-OH! LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE GOT CAUGHT RED HANDED DOING SOME "UH-HUH YOU KNOW WHAT!"

And there you have it: suede patches are cool so long as old people don't totally take the coolness out of it. Jeez, it's not like they invented it or anything.

Photos from:
streetfsn
GQ Eye: Tommy Ton

Reading List #2

2011-08-13T12:20:00.000-07:00

Francis

2011-08-10T12:39:00.001-07:00

You are the sum of your actions. That’s what the wealthy, the elite, the talented, the charming, the blessed, and those whose visions were rooted in the material - allowing them an easier time at obtaining them than those who’s visions occurred on another planet - all said. It’s easy to work hard when your road is yellow and brick. Francis prescribed to this doctrine. He was not in a position where he was happy to say that he was the sum of his actions, but he was sure that if he worked hard enough and with a bit of miracle arithmetic, he’d come out a fine number. He worked hard; filling out spreadsheets for a firm that did nothing in particular had paid well. He lived in a town where doing well was not a common thing. Cleveland hadn’t done well in years. The year that LeBron and Harvey Pekar left, one to Miami and one into the dirt, had been a rough one. Francis had survived and was making his way up; up into some social status that he could look down to his peers and say, “Well, the weather is nice. It’s certainly not as windy.” Things had been going well. He liked his name, which had a bit of old world wealth to it despite being Jewish, and he enjoyed the unstructured jackets he had purchased. If those actions went into the formula at the end, one word in his sum would be ‘elegant’. His sum was certainly increasing. This would change one day.

He sat on the toilet, thinking about nothing in particular. Perhaps how a master’s would look on his resume. That was quite an action to add to his sum. But he probably wasn’t thinking as he left his sportcoat on while sitting on the white pot. Finished, he stood up, turned around and realized what had happened. It was a debacle. Well not entirely, but for the most part. He had successfully gotten most of the shit in the toilet bowl, a small number to add to his sum, but a number none-the-less. However, his jacket, which he had meant to take to the tailor, was a tad long for him, and, as he took it off to investigate, had a smattering of shit hanging off the back. “Oh, this will not do. Not do at all. What a tragedy. What a cruel, unfortunate, unforeseeable mistake!” He cried to himself, though the man peeing in the other stall heard as well. He had made embarrassing mistakes before but never while prescribing to this philosophy. This wretched number would ruin his finale. His sum would forever read, “Francis: Sportcoat Shitter”. Tired and smelly, he did his best to remove the incident from his sportcoat. Then he balled up the cleaning supplies, balled it up with his old philosophical prescription, and tossed it into the pot. He flushed and went out to the sink, washed his hands – rubbing them almost raw – and went out the door with no idea who he was or who he intended to be. It was nice and refreshing.

Kimmel x Carhartt

2011-08-04T19:32:00.000-07:00

Adam Kimmel’s lookbooks would indicate that he did the costume design for Napoleon Dynamite. You could call his stuff cute or sensitive, but never graceful or anything aspirational. I’m not sure if I like it. His mainline looks tend for focus on the quirkiness, hidden selfishness, and imperfectability of humanity that few romanticists can get behind. It features people who wish to be left alone to enjoy their hobby - only coming out for the weekends or a movie caper; then they’ll gladly accept human company, though never offering society anything otherwise. It features happy, but small (not in the physical sense), ideas of people.

Adam Kimmel x Carhartt appears to deviate little from his quirky roots. With intentionally kitschy details it gives little room for people to assume the grandiose of a person. It’s just another person infatuated with their own eccentricity. However, I will admit that the suiting is nice though I don’t believe I’d wear both jacket and pants together. They seem like they would look best with other things. We saw this Carhartt collab not too long ago on high snobiety and through capsule shots but I’m not sure that I can be any saltier until I actually see it in the wild. Maybe I’m wrong and it doesn’t belittle the warmth of human nature. A little part of me hopes that the blazers don’t, because a little part of me really likes them.

Perhaps what makes a well-fitting suit, without gaudy self-aggrandizing details, great is that it indicates that a man is willing to take the time and effort to make himself contribute to an ideal that is bigger than just being an individual.

Critiques

2011-07-31T19:36:00.000-07:00

Given Sam Franklin’s enthusiasm, I had to give him a few more shots, so expect him to post on occasion. Recently, Sam told me he’s been reading tumblrs that critique the way people dress. He says he’s gotten a lot of inspiration from them and he would like to do a bit of critiquing of his own. According to Sam, his comments are, “witty and biting and really smart and sound smart too”. That’s good to know. We all need a bit of enlightenment. Once again, I present Sam Franklin.

this guy looks like a turd and everything about his outfit looks like poop he looks like a poop on a stick hahahalol

this guy looks like poop and thats because if you took all of his colors and mixed them up it would make brown which is poop haha

look at this guys what a dweeb hes wearing a tie bar that looks like poop and hes wearing a waistcoat which makes him look like hes trying really hard but actually makes him look like poop ahahahahalollol then he doesnt look like hes actually from london which makes him even more of a poop which is gross because poop is gross and then his all black makes him look like black bean diareaa which is groos and nasty and yucky and hes dressed terribly

Well, there you have it. It’s the infinite wisdom of Sam Franklin. Though he stole all of these images from tumblr and didn't cite them. I really don't feel like looking them up for him. My apologies if he stole your image.

Birkenstock Montana

2011-07-28T15:10:00.001-07:00

Birkenstock Montanas seem to be a bit difficult to find. Ebay and abroad are probably the best places to find them. Birkenstock USA currently doesn't stock them. They're something I've been on the lookout for due to their exclusivity. We're all egotistical fools and we might as well feed the beast.

The Montana has a hiking vibe that fewer are looking for these days. Look alike Alabama is an option but it isn't the same. That dull lacing system just doesn't do it for me. You wouldn't feed your child store brand Cheezits, would you?

Anyway, sort of a divergence here: I had a pair of knockoff Birkenstock clogs that I wore around my hometown. People perceived them as feminine and I took shit for them. When I wore them at boarding school, a good portion of guys wore them (and got in trouble for wearing them to class). While this occurance isn't unique by any means it's one that you have to keep in mind when meeting with unworldly folk. Your dub-monks just might be fruit boots to them. Unfortunate? Yes. A truth of life? Unfortunately. Just remember: if people have a problem with the way you present yourself "fuck off" seems to have worked well in the past.

-exception here would be to have clothing standards for work.

Jump

2011-07-26T17:54:00.001-07:00

Jumping, in retrospect, wasn’t the fastest way to die. He should’ve thought about that one. But like most things in life, he didn’t think about it before he did it. No use crying over spilt milk but this spilt milk hurt like a bitch. Some lady from a porch screams, “Oh my God! I think he fell!” Jumped more like. Though he supposed you could liken it to falling. Falling away from everything. Falling away from something that could never really reciprocate his feelings. His desire raging in his veins.

His wife had been crying for hours. Or bleary. More bleary than crying. Crying was a bit of an overstatement. It doesn’t thunderstorm for hours. It thunders for a while and then just rains and rains. So short bits of crying within a larger period of bleariness. He had just gotten his first pair of cordovans off ebay and his wife had walked in on him rubbing it in between his loins. His relationship with his wife deteriorated as his closet grew. Fewer nights spent with his wife and more nights searching for self-affirmation; an epiphany of happiness that he would achieve when he realized himself and how to perfectly present himself to others. Now his wife was moving about the apartment and began to pack a bag to visit her parents for the night. She wouldn’t understand how his love for her was boring and describable. It was the kind of love that wouldn’t keep either of them happy. His love for tailored menswear was truly indescribable. Words couldn’t describe the enjoyment he found tying a four-in-hand.

Later he realized he was wrong about that. The realization started after he critiqued some guys dress on tumblr. He said something like, “Shorts are totally inappropriate for any man to wear. They look far too casual with a blazer and make this guy look like he’s fat. He’s terribly dressed, really.” He had worn a pair of shorts that day. He had to artificially induce sleep that night, asphyxiating himself with a shantung tie and his hand holding his tubing. His wife had moved back in with her parents at that point. The next morning he went to his closet and realized that despite having 20 different spread collars to choose from, he wasn’t good enough for any of them. His love for menswear was describable. It was his hate for himself emerging. He tried to cover it with linen pants and unstructured sportcoats but when he did, he realized that he was still a shit. Overreacting to this realization he found himself at the top of a building.

The EMT arrived at the scene. He hoped they wouldn’t try CPR at any point. Broken rips wouldn’t make for a good silhouette. His thinking was oddly clear. As if you had to fall through the clouds to see anything. He still held menswear with regard. And he wished that he could apologize to just about everyone. When was the last time he had seen his mom? And then, his soul rose, like his erection for menswear, and drifted up and away from his body; leaving behind his Neapolitan clothed body to sadder endings.

Email

2011-07-18T19:19:00.000-07:00

guidetobadtaste@gmail.com

Trendwatch: Face Care

2011-07-14T18:24:00.000-07:00

It's been awhile since we've had a trend watch. Summer's here and your face is probably burning.

Guys have not only begun to worry about the quality of shoes that they put on their feet but also what they put on their face as they venture into discovering the quality products for face care. Each guy has different preferences when it comes to this sort of thing so I’ll just run through the basics. Some people like to quote Pat Bateman from Ellis’s work, “American Psycho”, when they talk about men’s face care but they just like to show how intelligent they are by quoting a fairly popular piece of literature. I’m not sure how much they actually know about taking care of their faces.

Cleaner: Most everyone uses face cleaner at this point and each have their preferences. Astringent and benzol peroxide are some favorites. Just remember, don’t go overboard and dry your face out.

Moisturizer: Moisturizers are great because you put them on in the morning and you’ll feel like a million bucks for the rest of the day. Your face won’t feel dried out, flaky, and splotchy. Moisturizer makes sure that your face is healthy and won’t age as quickly as it would otherwise.

Lip stick: All sorts of heritage brands are releasing various kinds of men's lipsticks. Make sure that you apply generously so that your lip contrast is noticeable.

Use these three products and you’ll be quite the rugged man all summer. You’ll have a well maintained hide for the fall weather and have potential street style shots.

guest blogger: sam franklin

2011-07-10T21:33:00.000-07:00

hi im sam franklin and ill be blogging for john because hes really busy with work right now and cant do this for a bit and he wanted to make sure that you guys had some stuff to read so im here to write for you

in keeping with his style I thought id write you guys a story I made up

frankie was sitting in the coffee shop drankin espressos being really cool in his based lobbs (lolololololololololloloollklloolokolol) and isaia and just being like really cool and then michael bastin walked in and everybody was like ‘who is this guys he doesnt look like anyone that I no’ but frankie was like ‘holy poop its bastin’ as he tried to contain his excitement he hoped that bastin wouldnt notice him cause he was totally not jawnzed out or anything because like he coulda done so much better and bastinninny went and got a coffee from the girl serving coffee who was a total skank and frankie hated her guts bastin should totally talk to him instead of that whore cause he had lots of interesting ideas and she just knew how to make coffee she probably didnt even know that you need yogurt to make a smoothie she just splooged the whipped cream on top when bastin got his coffee he turned around and saw frankie and he walked over and frankie was like holy shit hes walking over to me and bastin was like ‘hey you got great style you should totally work for me’ and frankie was like omg no way I have a ton of good ideas that no one nos about and bastin was like we should go to my studio to discuss them so no one else hears them we dont want urban outfitters finding out about them and copying them so they went back to the studio and frankie showed him all of his ideas one was like a blazer made out of goretex so that you could be jawnzed in the rain in stuff and there was a bunch of other cooll stuff that I cant think of right now like some shoes that are cool and it was really awesome and then I was going to write in a problem that frankie and bastin would have to solve oh wait there was a guy from uo that they killed but and then they rolled him in a carpet and drove out to the docks and threw him out but I couldnt think of a good one so I think id be better at just writing product reviews because I just know my stuff better than other people and I have a really nice point and shoot that might be as good as like dlsr but probably not but then franklin and bastin released their collection called ‘frankie and bastin’ and it was really awesome and everyone wrote product reviews about it and then bastin and frankie were like the best friends for every and they shared bracelets that said bffs so everyone knew and everyone though frankie was really cool omg bastin is hawt <3<3<3<3 harry potter

8.15

2011-07-06T18:04:00.000-07:00

Occasionally, mostly from me, I think there tends to be a worry about market oversaturation. This is really just a post to convince myself of something. I would like to think that market oversaturation isn’t very desirable. Oversaturation tends to matriculate down to cheaper brands, which just copy off of the brands that were originally producing for that style. Enter August 15th. There’s nothing new here. Neither is the price point. How does this brand attract consumers? Beats me, I wasn’t able to turn up much besides that they’re carried by Unionmade. I would like to imagine these people to be a bunch of assholes who are looking to make a quick buck off the heritage revival by selling them the same stuff they’ve been sold for the past 3 years and some crappy flash website. That’s probably not the case. They're probably a bunch of people who love quality clothes. I tend to be a cynic, in case you haven’t noticed.

Why should we embrace new brands since we’ve already found brands that make quality clothes? Because the new brands keep the older brands honest. They encourage the quality of garments to be held to the highest standard and the price point to be more competitive. If it turns out that 8.15 makes a better $200 chambray than the next brand, then the people buying a shirt that expensive will prefer the 8.15 shirt. If another brand makes a shirt of the same quality as 8.15 for a lower price point, then people will buy that other brand’s shirt. There's nothing new here. Oversaturation is better for you and me than undersaturation. Some brands will fall under the steam roller of capitalism, but hey, workwear loves America and industry. You don't make things that people don't want and become successful here. Don’t cry over a business risk that didn’t pan out. Banks still seem to be willing to front just about anything. Maybe you should start a wooden swan business? That seems due for a revival. My grandmother gave my family one but I haven’t seen too many floating around these days.

Joints

2011-07-03T22:00:00.000-07:00

The two police officers sat in their unmarked Crown Victoria and drank their over-sugarized coffees that they had gotten from the station 20 minutes ago. They meant business. Which is funny because meaning business is completely different from doing business. They both wore Starter jackets. The one sitting in the driver’s seat, Frank Thomson, was decked out in his Raiders jacket. The one sitting in the passenger’s seat, Bobby Thompson, was wearing a Spurs jacket. They were the type of cops who scared the crap of neighborhood kids who ran through stop signs with their bicycles. Any one who committed more serious crimes would ask, “who?” when you mentioned their names. They were staked out because Thomson had heard about someone selling ‘joints’ in the apartment complex they were parked outside of. The car smelled of BK Stackers and cigarettes. Those were just the main smells. There was some old coffee with dust mixed in there. It choked both of them and perhaps was making them more delusional than they usually were. These two were to the type to get excited about going to the shooting range and getting to go out in a squad car. Though in all fairness, car rides are a lot of fun. “Man, it has been awhile. Are you sure this guy lives here?” Thompson asks as he turns to Thomson. Thomson looks at Thompson, frowns, turns back to the complex, and replies, “Yes. The tipoff definitely said it was here. This is where he said he got his ‘joints’ from.” Thomson pauses for a second for dramatic effect and to think about the reception they’d get for cleaning up the streets. The applause would be enough for him. Both of them might get a medal. He scratched his chin and started again, “And this is where we make our name.” There was a long pause. “Are ‘joints’ weed?” asked Thompson.

He was walking back from the coffee shop where he had parked his macbook toting buttocks for the afternoon. The girl he had been talking to was a cutie. A cutie with a booty. She also happened to be an amateur philosopher. Or so he thought. That was the impression she appeared to be trying to give him. He liked her. She inflated his ego, complimented him on his clean fingernails, and she liked the same kind of smoothies as he did. She had said something to him today that he had really liked. It was something along the lines of, “y’know what’s sad? The fact that no one, not in the entire world, will have the same experiences, thoughts, feelings, and consciousness that you do. You will be completely alone in your thoughts and your mental film of your life.” After she had finished she bit her bottom lip nervously like she saw the movie stars do. He liked the idea. No one would ever be him. He was the most unique person he knew and he was glad to keep it that way. He often tried to show off his uniqueness by never mentioning family or his history to others that he met. He thought it made him seem like he had always been like he currently was; forever 25, selling dirt cheap used sportcoats for a profit. To others it would seem as though he was some minor immortal, as if he had been born of the city, and he was doing what he loved for longer than others due to that immortality that he oozed. He was still grinning as he entered his apartment to pick up the ‘joints’ that he kept in his duffle bag. He had found a bunch of Italian sportcoats at his secret thrift store and he was reselling them for a profit. He picked up the duffle bag and began to walk it out to his car.

“There he goes,” Thomson almost jumps through the roof of his car as he sees the sportcoated man exit his apartment. “Are you sure that we can do this?” asks Thompson starting to get a little scared. It was too late though. Thomson had already grabbed his bat and was stalking over. Thompson scrambled out of the car after him.

Two goofy looking guys approached him as he threw his duffle into his trunk. They looked silly, carrying bats and wearing Starter jackets. He almost laughed. Though with the first swing, he had no breath to laugh with. They knocked him down and almost put him out but he hung onto consciousness as he worried if these guys would steal his car. The taller one stood over him with a bat as the shorter rummaged through his duffle. “Thomson,” the rummager whined, “there aren’t any ‘joints’ in here! These are all just sportcoats!” The taller one turned and ripped though the contents of the bag. “No weed?! But he said his duffle was always full of joints! Fuck! We’re gonna’ have to make ourselves scarce!” The taller one wheeled about in rage. The shorter one looked as though he was about to cry, “I don’t think that this was lega-

When he came to, his forehead was bleeding. Evening had started yet no one had bothered to find out was wrong with the man. Not their problem. He pulled himself up onto the curb and held his head. His lip was dripping blood onto his Brioni and onto the pavement. He wished someone would help him. Maybe that philosophy girl would take pity on him if he showed up to her apartment. He would tell her all about what had happened, she would understand exactly what had gone down and believe him, feel his pain, and share in his confusion in why he had been brutally beaten down. He wished his mother were there. She made really good cookies.

Esquire

2011-06-28T18:27:00.000-07:00

I got featured on Esquire.com. That doesn't happen everyday. Thanks guys.

SERIOUSLY GUYS. THEY'RE FOR GIRLS.

2011-06-16T21:24:00.000-07:00

The style blogger skipped down the street confidently in his St. James boat neck. He was super proud of it ‘cause of the picture he had saved of James Dean wearing the same thing. The sun peeked from behind a cloud and rushed down, to slob over the blogger’s neck, intent on leaving a June hickey. The blogger embraced the sun’s warmth and picked up his step even faster. He was, to quote, ‘walking on sunshine’. A man with in French-esque garb on a silly motor scooter drove by and shouted, “Vous sale garce, me donner un baiser mouillé!” Confused, the blogger skipped on. Feeling a smoke, he pulled up on a porch outside an apartment, yanked a cigarette to his mouth. A woman opened a window on the second story, looked down, and yelled at the blogger, “Ne restez pas sur mon porche, femme pirate!” Shocked, the blogger walked off the porch and almost collided with a man riding a bicycle with a basket on the front, which happened to be full of baguettes. The man swerved to the right, as the blogger spun in a circle, similar to the Saturday morning cartoons. The cyclist had a thin mustache and wore a beret. “Hors de mon chemin, la femme de la rue!” He shouted at the blogger.
Which was odd, this was Boston. Why was everyone speaking what sounded like French? Questions swirled in the blogger’s mind, taking him away from his self-absorbed confidence. He moved along, oblivious to everything else, absorbed in his confusion. His mulling was broken when the sidewalk opened up to reveal a gaping mouth, which looked to be a hole to China, for all he knew. And the mouth moved it’s concrete lips, with a low Snuffleupagus whine, he spoke to the blogger, “Oh mon dieu, quelle fille chaude! Je pourrais vous manger pour le dîner!!”

Which the sidewalk did, as he grabbed the blogger by the foot, and swallowed him whole.

2011-06-15T17:56:00.000-07:00

Photo hoodwinked from The Armoury.

As Pitti images flood your dash, I offer a bit of advice. It’s been awhile since I’ve openly doled out what and what not to do. I try not to be too preachy, though my Mother’s conservative Methodist roots occasionally get the best of me. You’ll be full with images to satiate you for the summer, appeasing your mouse-clicking appetite and hopefully inspire you to attempt to channel a little of the same flair that those specific men have (I’m not particularly fond of Italian dress, but I understand that everyone else is. I figure I should make an attempt to stay on topic). However, I think that there are certain ways that you should look at these images; as rapidly glancing, taking quick notes, and then moving on may have worked on field trips, but it doesn’t work as well now. As sites offer up their images for you to peruse, I suggest that you pick the few that you really like. Sure, why not reblog it? Then, save those images to your computer so you don’t lose them. Maybe you put one as your background when no one is around. You set one in a box to the side as you work on homework, or do other things on the Internet (centipede?). Allow those images to age with you, as long as you think they remain valuable to your observation. Try to pick out new things that you never noticed before. Try to be able to put into words what you like and don’t like about the photo. Whether it’s the colors, texture, pattern clashing, quality of the leather goods, or whatever else you think makes you enjoy the photo. Now that you’ve discovered what you like and don’t like about the photo, determine if you aspire to dress in said manner. If yes, then determine what you think would and wouldn’t work for you. How would one go about adding the flairs in the photo to your personal style? If you can’t answer this, there are the “experts”.

This ended up being an unorganized mess. The main point that you should take away from this is that by spending more than 30 seconds with each photo, you will be able to better execute your own personal style. You won’t be off chasing clouds thinking that by purchasing, you will be able to be “steezy”. By spending time with the photos you will have a greater understanding of your own style and how to make your style progressive. Learning the tricks of any trade takes time. You’ll be able to incorporate them into the way you dress without spending a cent. Granted you have the basics, of course. I enjoy stagnation as much as the next trad but time leaves all things behind.

Dinner

2011-06-08T17:19:00.000-07:00

Sitting awkwardly at the dinner table, eating – coincidentally – dinner, the family of three attempted to break the thick bramble of their days that kept them apart. Junior had been on a date earlier that day. So for the moment, that was the topic of interest. Dad ate slowly with intention and did not pick at his food like Mom. Mom picked at her food because she was watching her figure. Why she did, Junior did not know. Dad could care less. Maybe it was to show off to her overweight friends that she retains some of that high school energy. Junior was the only child at that moment. Older Sister was off in some mystical place, probably dropping acid with her free love boyfriend. Or was it girlfriend? Junior did not know or care. “So, where did you take her?” Mom started.
“Well, everyone likes sandwiches, so I took her to Sicily’s and we got paninis,” replied Junior.
“Did you remember to pay?”
“Mom, I did everything you told me.”
“Well, that’s good. You’ll have to bring her home sometime so that we can meet her. I’d like to meet her, wouldn’t you dear?” Mom glanced at Dad. Dad snarfed on his food and shrugged, probably in approval. Work really took its toll on Dad. It made Junior sick that his dad would be paying for college, but he supposed that was how it worked these days. His Dad made good money, but Junior was never sure of their fiscal situation. Why was Dad working so hard, was it because their financial situation wasn’t as good as Junior previously thought? Was it because Dad didn’t know what to do with himself when he wasn’t working? That might be it but Junior couldn’t be sure. “What was she wearing?” Mom always asked banal awkward questions.
“Uhhh, a white dress.” Junior balked. It was actually jhorts and a button down but for some reason he lied. It was something that Junior sometimes couldn't help.
“Oh, well, that’s nice, isn’t it dear?” Mom turned to Dad. Dad nodded approval while munching on some meatloaf.
“Well, then Junior, what did you wear?” Mom turned back to Junior.
“Well,” now this was something that Junior could go on for forever. He had painstakingly planned out everything. Going to the internet to ask questions, putting himself out there, making himself to seem vulnerable, to see if any one could solve his conundrum. He scoured pictures on tumblr and read the past six months of GQ. He laid everything out the night before and changed everything before he went out. Junior just couldn't get it right. He wasn't sure he could replicate the 'cool' that he saw on the Internet. “I wore a dip-dye t-shirt, Incotex trousers, and hiking boots.”
“Now why did you wear that?” Mom smiled, confused as to why those things seemed to appropriate to Junior.
“Well, there’s these guys on the Internet who answer questions, and I well… asked them what I should wear.” Junior replied. Dad snorted and mumbled something through his food and under his breath. Junior shot Dad a glare reflexively, but then remember that you really can’t glare at Dad. Dad really didn’t give a crap about getting glared at.
“I asked a bunch of different guys and they all gave me different answers, so I just mixed all of them.”
“Oh, well I guess that makes a little more sense.” Mom replied, still mostly confused and muddled. Dad looked up and shrugged his shoulders. Dad thought about stepping in and correcting Junior’s mistakes, but then thought better of it. Junior would learn in due time.
They sat in quiet and each thought to themselves. Dad thought about the Age of Empires game that he would be playing later that night and reading the full RSS feed that he hid from his wife and kid. Mom thought about the possibility of dessert. Junior thought about what he would do differently next time he saw her. Probably not mix all the advice of the style bloggers. That may have been a bad call. But he’d probably still follow their advice when they told him what to wear. They were, after all, experts.

Spring Cleaning

2011-05-31T10:15:00.000-07:00

When he sent his kids off to college, his wife demanded that they clean out the attic. No longer would it be messy and full of crap they didn’t need. Who knew what they would put in there but they were consumers, he was sure that they would find something. He opened the door to his attic and the smell of sawdust and must flowed out, as the fan in the adjacent room pulled the air towards itself. He creaked up the steps in his socks and when he reached the top he stopped to look around. Dozens of cardboard boxes piled on top of each other and made the project look much more formidable than it previously had. He started with a top box of a pile way in the corner, opened it up, creaked down the steps with it in his arms, and threw it into the back of the car. He did the same for the rest in the pile until he had reached the last one. When he reached the last one, he noticed that it was dusty and hadn’t been opened for some time. It figured. He had realized at his first child’s first birthday that he was not the nostalgic person he had once thought he was. He read the label. “Italian” was scrawled in a sharpie across the front. He opened it and looked inside. It was full of cut-aways and no break trousers that he had stopped wearing long before his first child was born. He shrugged and closed the box back up and took it out to the car.

When he started to take the second pile out to the car, he read the label of the top box. It read, “Americana/timeless”. He didn’t even bother to open it up as he picked it up and took it down the stairs.

Reasonable

2011-05-25T14:47:00.000-07:00

Perhaps out of a desire to write about new things, to be first amongst amateur menswear reporters, we forget about simple things like LL Bean and other mid-range brands.

“Nah, brah, even my undershirts are three figures.”
“Was it a custom order for Context?”
“My jacket was inspired by Shackleton’s doomed expedition but I’ve never been out of Maryland.”

No doubt these things are cool, but tend to feel precious because of their price tag, despite their rugged intentions. Now a decent coat on the cheap? That, most people can get behind. Orvis offers the best options when it comes to gear that would fall under what some people call cool and at the same time, something that you can trash. They carry a good amount of Barbour but also offer a line of their own that gets little to no face time. Most of the items are under $250, which in comparison is cheap. Medium is as small as they go, so fashionistas clamoring for a slim cut can bug off to H&M. For inspiration on how not to look like a soccer dad when you wear these, just look at Tommy Ton’s winter photos. I’m sure you’ll find something.

Out of class and into the hall

2011-05-17T15:11:00.000-07:00

Pat sat in the lecture hall staring at the off-white, or diseased white, ceiling tiles. The professor, yacking at the class, sallowed in the sickly glow of the florescent lighting. Class was seconds from over and the professor’s pant legs flopped everywhere unnaturally. If the professor had any sense or knowledge he would have had them tapered to 15”. Or at least 16”. 15” perhaps was a tad aggressive for a man of his girth. The man’s imperfection irritated Pat and Pat had the desire to never do a single problem that the professor assigned out of the textbook. Grades did not matter if your social knowledge was better than everyone else’s. Class dismissed and everyone filed out of the lecture hall except for Pat. The professor collected his things and scurried out the door to indulge in his fascination with tying fishing flies. Pat sat alone, lost in his ruminations of tapered legs, as he had the class after this in the same room.

Students slipped into the classroom, unaware that others were there, and began taking out their books. Comfortable in his chair, Pat slouched back and observed his sartorial superiority to the other boys in the class. In their defense, they didn’t have the knack; the know. The professor of this class was in the know. Tailored sportcoats and trousers abounded in his wardrobe. The man walked as though he had never known a tie from Sears. The professor strolled to the front of the class and set down his old leather briefcase, full of papers, which happened to be full of knowledge and full of nobility. Today, the professor had a button missing from the collar of his button down. Normally, this would be non-chalant, as if by accident. Y’know, natural. But something was wrong, something felt off with what the professor was wearing today. Acid rose in Pat’s throat. The lost button wasn’t natural at all. The whole thing was a sham. It was a huge horrible lie and Pat had fallen for it. He got up quickly and moved quickly towards the door of the lecture hall, using the desks to balance himself. Students looked surprised, as Pat usually carried himself without a care. With both hands, Pat pushed out of the door without the professor even noticing. He stumbled to the grey oversized trashcan in the hallway and retched over it. The coffee and Doritos he had eaten for breakfast came from his throat, around his teeth, and out his mouth. Pat heaved twice to get the remnants from sticking to his tongue and then breathed heavily as sweat collected on his brow. He heaved again trying to vomit out his own elitism but the beer he had drank before he went to bed was the only thing to come out. Perhaps the second professor was not natural at all. Maybe it was the first professor, with the wide pant legs and fly fishing fetish, that was the true natural person. Pat probably wouldn’t ever be able to find out. He still had the sickness, deep inside his gut.

J. Crew X Jesus Christ

2011-04-24T20:27:00.000-07:00

J. Crew announced a new collab today between themselves and Jesus Chirst, known around the blogosphere as JC. Together they will be producing a tunic that will make you look good while being nailed to a cross or for sitting in a sweltering church over the summer. Recently risen, Jesus Christ released a few comments about the collab. “I think this will improve the image of both brands. Evangelists will flock from everywhere to pick up a tunic, which is great for J. Crew. Plus, consumerists will become more aware of the fact that I died for their sins, which is always a plus for me. Seriously, pants won’t save your soul. I’d like to continue this relationship with J. Crew but we’ll have to see how this tunic sells.” J. Crew plans to do an exclusive online J. Crew X Jesus Christ look book. We were unable to contact Frank Muytjens (pronounced Muy-dooby-booby-gens) for comment on how successful he thought the collab would be but sources tell us that he was a doubting Thomas.

When Jesus was asked what trend he saw those three days he was dead, he responded, “Boot cut jeans, those are just bad. Peter wore those all the time. I can’t believe I trusted my church with him.” I concur.

Happy Easter. Enjoy the time with your family and your friends.

Photo from NB

White Pants

2011-04-23T22:18:00.000-07:00

You’ve got questions to answer. People are demanding your attention with trite questions that they could find out with a google search. It frustrates you that this occurs but alas, you certainly wouldn’t want to lose followers. Your mother has asked you to get off the white couch with your new selvedge, as the indigo gets everywhere. But questions come first. You answer the easy ones first, where to get spiffied up (duh), what to wear with a black tie (one thing), and how to put on a shirt (tag on the inside). Halfway through answering a question about where to find a tailor (they’re typically in a place called ‘the tailor’s’) you are notified that you have a notification. Under your mp3 upload from Beck’s Mellow Gold album some bro is calling you out. “hay man. Your probably 1 of those ppl who started to like beck after guero your so cool.” Oh man, you hate petty arguments like this. You’re totally above them and morally superior to people who think they know music better than you do. You’re a cultural genius. You are all knowing. You are always first to the punch. Someone else makes it? You sure as hell let everyone else know that they made it and that you reblogged it. Well, this fucker was trying to show you up. You respond, “Yo, wanna’ have this argument? I started listening to Beck when Mellow Gold dropped and have followed him since. I have always been a Beck fan.” This would show this fucker that you’re superior to him. None of it was true, but it didn’t really matter. You actually didn’t start listening to Beck until after Sea Change but it’s the internet. You were still pooping your diaper when Mellow Gold dropped. No reason to tell the truth on the web. Ever.

Your mother screams at you to get off the couch. “If you’re gonna’ sit on the couch, put those white pants I bought you on,” she yells from the kitchen. Well, you had finished complaining about your life to your followers, you figured you’d play the martyr and change your pants. All the females who followed you and were under the impression that you actually dressed well (well, you did dress well. Just not as well as you were comfortable with) offered their sympathy when you waited until the last second to do your homework and griped about it on the web. This always made you smile. Someone did care about you, even if they were 1500 miles away and completely incompatible with you in real life. You stepped out onto your back porch to smoke because if you changed pants before you smoke, you might forget your cigs in you pant pocket and leave them upstairs. The house next door looked exactly like yours. Big, plastic, landscaped by the same people who landscaped everyone else’s, with a Land Rover sitting in the drive. The other house next door looked just like the house next door and that one looked like your house. Your house looked like the house across the street. On the back porch of the house next door stood a neighbor boy. You never learned his name even though he was the same age as you. He was wearing white pants and was smoking the same cigarettes as you did. Good thing you hadn’t changed into your white pants like your mother had asked. Individual. Thunderclouds rolled in and prepared for a late afternoon crash, boom, and shatter. You could hear the grumbling of the sky’s gut. The thundercloud’s rage built up like your elitism. Maybe this was the kid who had accused you of not liking Beck until Guero. Maybe, just maybe. Maybe this kid had a gun. A little one. Like the kind you see on EDC. Maybe this kid would freak out like those kids in the news, walk across his lawn to your back porch, raise his pistol, and shoot a bullet through your shirt that you wore on Fridays, into your chest, out your back, and through the other side of you shirt. Maybe he’d put you out of your misery. Maybe you'd never have to reblog anything ever again. Maybe he’d redeem you from your couch. Maybe he’d vault you into a story in the news. Maybe he’d just take all your followers and tell them that you hadn’t heard of Beck until Sea Change.

On second thought, you hoped that boy stayed right where he was, played lacrosse rather than answer questions on the internet, and had never listen to Beck once in his life.

Epochs of MW

2011-04-14T20:40:00.000-07:00

My first semester in college I had a choir professor teach me about art. Well, more specifically, how to look at art by not attaching any adjectives that carried relative weight to different people. It was an easy class. At the end of the semester he presented the comment that the current epoch of music was coming to a close. At the end of every epoch, musicians just take what people have been doing in the past, and mix it all up. With the arrival of mash-ups of a few years ago, pop-music was going to evolve into something else. It will become something not pop. As a random author from some online music magazine once said, “pop will eat itself.”

I’d like to think that menswear would evolve in such a way that music does and that we are nearing the end of an epoch. Who knows what we’ll be wearing in 30 years much less 5 months? Maybe we’ll be wearing jumpsuits in 3 weeks. One can certainly say that menswear has been a mash-up of history after World War II. From this I’d love to say that menswear is unpredictable and we cannot say where it is going: all forecasts are off.

Menswear doesn’t resemble the model I presented. Many people do not find joy in clothes. Much of society finds joy in music. Music is for most a means to happiness. For many, clothes are a means to covering yourself up and keeping warm. Clothes are too functional to resemble music and its evolution through epochs. However, I think that the menswear mash-up of the past 70 years should be observed and my model taken into consideration. It would be pretty awesome to be right.

Corduroy

2011-04-06T20:36:00.000-07:00

I remember the first time I wore my corduroy shirt. Now it's faded and one side has taken on a bleach-y orange hue. It's "hobo-chic" as the fruitcakes would say but I'm sure somewhere would try to sell me the same thing for three figures. But back then, it was crisp and clean, straight out of the LL Bean catalog. It was approaching the holidays and my mother bought my brother and I the same shirt, only different colors. I had a lot of red shirts, I have a dark complexion, and my brother usually wore green or blue, he has a light. My mother was a bit obsessive about things like that. I don't remember why, but we switched it up when we got those shirts. I took the green corduroy shirt and my brother took the red corduroy shirt. I was probably about 10 years old.

The first time we wore those shirts was to a Christmas party. It happened to be a Mennonite Christmas party. I'm Presbyterian but my family knows a number of the Mennonite families as we homeschooled at that period in time. My mother was a homeschool "organizer", you could say. The Mennonites that my family know run a boy's camp. It is a camp for troubled boys who act violently towards their parents and peers and are no longer able to be in their local schools. It is a last resort before kids got shipped off to a detention center. I always imagine the Mennonites talking to struggling parents, "We understand. We know that institutionalizing these boys probably won't work. Let us give them a little love and a little responsibility and see what happens." There the boys go out into the woods and live in tents with Mennonite conselours. They live in the woods for a number of weeks in hope that the new responsibilites they acquired will shape them into well-behaved young men. Some boys do better and some don't. The Mennonites do not make a lot money, and what they do earn goes to support their families and the boys camp. Selfless doesn't really seem to describe the Mennonites. Recently, in order to help support the camp, the church opened a ice cream parlor. All the girls who work there volunteer their time and all the profits go to the boys camp. All the Mennonites who volunteer their time to the boys camp aren't hoping to add the hours to their college application, they're hoping to better other people's lives.

Before we headed up to the lodge, my parents explained how the boys camp worked to me, my brothers, and my sister. I don't remember much from the party. The food was good and the lodge had a big fire. After dinner I remember playing tag outside in the cold and dark. I think it was that night that I realized that Mennonites weren't different than us because they always tucked their shirts in and the women always wore skirts and caps. Mennonites are different than us because they are genuinely good and kind people. They don't count your faults, they don't judge you for your political views, and they don't judge you for the world that you participate in. They're not out to evangelize every Joe Schmo, they're out to make the world a better place, regardless of the world's religion.

I hope that there's a heaven. Not for myself. I'm probably too materialist to make the cut anyway. When I die, I'm fine with just turning off like a TV. Ceasing to exist doesn't seem like a bad thing. I haven't done anything special to deserve anything else. I hope that there's a heaven for the Mennonites. I hope that when they reach it that someone is there waiting to shake their hand and say, "Thank you. Thank you for caring about human beings. Thank you for caring about me."

And that was the first time I wore my corduroy shirt.

Chuggin'

2011-03-29T17:46:00.000-07:00

"Innovation makes menswear go 'round" a wise man once said. I heard it. I was there. Who innovates menswear? College bros, that's who. Visors? Some bro needed to keep from getting hat hair while, at the same time, shade his eyes. Truly, an invention of genius.

Surprisingly, there is an innovation in menswear still waiting for the bros to popularize and permeate into the mainstream. What it is, I am still getting to, but with all the style conscience bros out there, one would have thought that this trend would have already made its rounds to the department stores. Style conscience bros are usually wearing selvedge denim with faded knees because they on their knees all the time (because they're beer bonging... what did you think they were doing?), but like any body else, they gotta' mix it up. Cargo pants are the obvious choice, with all the pockets to carry stuff, and they are popular on campuses. Companies have been producing many high quality cargo pants that have been missing a necessary feature: the butt-chugging fly.

When butt-chugging, no true gentleman should have to remove their pants, so why not make a fly for the funnel? It's perfect. Can't wait to see this in stores F/W 2012.

Photo originally from Mark McChuggin

Parting thoughts: Sequel? What is this, a Harry Potter fan-fic site?

MWAC

2011-03-21T19:25:00.000-07:00

2041. Harold sat in his office. He thumbed the edges of the envelope that he held in his hand. He sighed, held the envelope in his right hand, and thumbed the worn lapels of his bespoke jacket with his left. "Well, it was a good run. No reason to whine" he sat and thought. His equipment in his office was outdated. Actually, the whole office was outdated: Macbooks from 2023 and polyeurethane chairs from some heritage movement 22 or 23 years ago. The MensWear Approval Committee (MWAC) had been formed in 2012 to give unemployed menswear bloggers a job in tough times. Can't be bespoke and flip burgers, it doesn't work; Harold knew first hand. Unfortunately, MWAC never really held any power. Washington could expand the bureaucracy but they couldn't enforce something like tasteful dressing. MWAC merely made recommendations to other men for decades. MWAC employees scoured public cameras, sending vocal messages through a megaphone system across America. Messages of "don't wear that with that!" and "Sneakers and suits? What do you think this is, GQ?" were doled out daily. Harold remembered a time when his superiors wished for so much more. Fueled with divine right and a Rand-ian fervor, his superiors had fought tooth and claw to get some sort of legal power. "Charge that man for wearing out of proportion boots!" they would scream. Washington threw their reports in with the National Park Service reports. The only real reason MWAC was around was to expand bureaucracy. Washington enjoyed that sort of thing.

MWAC paid well. It wasn't tax dollars that fueled his salary, it was loans from China. Or it was, until China decided that US was unlikely to pay those back. China cut their losses and invested elsewhere. Other developing countries tried their hand at buying US debt but it never turned out well. But Harold still got paid. He could afford domestic goods and the like. Hong Kong tailors? Out of the question 20 years ago and even more so now. Harold had to make do with what was made in the US. Harold remembered a time when MWAC actually did help men dress better. It was back when Americans still made a wage comparable to China. Now everything was domestic except for t-shirts. They made those in Somalia.

Not that men needed anyone telling them how to dress anymore. It hardly mattered with man's current status. Harold's wife was a nice lady. A stout traditionalist. She didn't believe in abandoning the male species, she took care of Harold, and she understood how things used to be. Still, there were many men who had no spouse, lived off the streets, and scraped to get by. Men never went to college any more. The smart ones went to technical school to fix cars and the like. Women didn't like to fix the plumbing or lay flooring. Offices jobs? Forget it. Fewer men had been enrolled in college than women for years. With female economic 'independence', few women needed to take on a spouse. Make some kids, then toss 'dad out the door. He'd probably just become a drunk anyway. No need to expose the kids to that. MWAC really did nothing. No reason for them to yak at Joe Schmo for wearing square toes. They probably kept his toes warm in the winter and he wasn't getting wedded anytime soon. Well it had been coming to man. Didn't Thomas Jefferson say something like, "Man was made to carry others on his back like a horse"? Maybe not, he had read it off some tumblr was back in the day and they tended to be unreliable.

Harold opened the envelope and read. He was fired. So was everyone else. It had finally happened, they were getting rid of MWAC as part of government cuts. He sat back in his chair. It was 20th century and well-made in the USA. He could finally go home. He would sit on his porch with other well suited men, drink whiskey, and hope the world would forget about him. Hopefully his liver would give out before his wife's patience did. No one cared about the MWAC anymore. No one cared about men anymore. Maybe men would get a second chance in some heritage revival, but Harold doubted it.

SeaVees: The Tragedy?

2011-03-13T15:57:00.001-07:00

As brands revamp their lines to meet consumers interest in 'heritage' and the like, some will miss the boat as their impressions of what their consumers want. Given the amount of times I've seen SeaVees with the label, 'on sale', and the cold shoulder from the blogging community, I think it's reasonable for me to say that SeaVees is one of these brands. Sort of like a washed up salesman who does not understand a new trend, SeaVees attempted to re-invent themselves and created product that few want. SeaVees products don't remind me of the business class from days by gone, they remind me of sneaker hybrids that have been shunned as of late.

First, we've got the basic white sneaker. JCrew stocked these in the past, but this spring we haven't seen them yet on the web. If I were more obnoxious, pretentious, and ill-informed, I'd call these "iconic". Unfortunately, so are all white sneakers. Where a brand like Alden can sell their shoes based on quality, and sneaker brand has to find a good blend of quality and price. Converse and Vans have found their sweet spots, so more than $60 is too much to charge for a canvas sneaker. SeaVees have better quality? That's debatable, plus, unlike a wingtip or a penny loafter (or, erm, a tassle loafer), nobody buys white sneakers to last them 20 years. Give them 2-3 years and then they're cast away like a Disney star that hasn't learned to juggle their movie career and their cocaine addiction at the same time.

Too much stitching and too much suck. Looks like they were made in Malaysia for Gap's in-house shoe line.

Obviously a Wallabee knock-off, these should do well, right? They look more stable and lighter than the Walla' low boot. That is, until you consider the mark up. And, if you look real close, the sole continues up the heel. Dumb as hell? Dumb as hell.

Yep, that's their interpretation of a chelsea boot. If you haven't figured it out, SeaVees, like Detroit of a few years ago, just takes old cars, puts some crap on them to make them look new, and sells them to the public. Or if that simile doesn't satisfy you, they rape the classics and have some babies that are traumatized for life.

Ok, this one isn't bad. It's a desert boot that stands fairly true compared to the classics. But it doesn't stand true to the classic $100 price point. Also, you can tell the sole isn't real crepe, which would make critics cringe. You don't have to be an expert to know that the rubber sole cheapens the look. That won't win you any battles... times your mom.

Here we are, the only boot that SeaVees offers that I think may deserve consideration for any guy. Though, to consider it, you have to hate the bean boot and the LL Bean return policy (which is impossible) and you have to do a whole lot of sloshing around. Spend much time wading around in the mud, digging for shellfish? Plus the whole completely rubber boot thing gives off more of a 'lesbian fisherwoman' vibe than a masculine 'I'm all about America and the Adirondacks' vibe.

So what made SeaVees miss the target? It looks like they were under the impression that streetwear guys converting from sneakers to wingtips would need some help bridging the ravine. SeaVees made a bunch of sneaker hybrids that they thought would win them sneakerheads who couldn't dig wingtips. It turns out that those sneakerheads could dig wingtips. So now SeaVees is producing shoes that look like sneaker hybrids for business casual. Count me out. JCrew carried a number of SeaVees for the last few seasons, but this season has less. I'm sure you've perused the sale sections. I don't know about you, but I saw a number of SeaVees. SeaVees attempted to create a 'heritage' but missed with the execution and the price point. Guys want "classics" but SeaVees hasn't been able to deliver.

Relative vs. Set Taste

2011-03-02T20:51:00.000-08:00

This debate has been floating around for a bit. It deserves a bit of light, a bit of mediation, and a few more people to participate to fully grow into something. I'm going to say straight off the bat, I don't think style is relative. It can be defined and it is not dependent on the beholder. Would you not agree that a good artist is someone who effectively conveys his message though some medium? If I wanted my picture to convey a message of violence and everyone sees it as sadness, then I am not an effective artist. If you aim to dress well but everyone sees it as slobby, then you failed to convey the message that you are a well dressed person. I could continue, but others have walked these paths.

Jon Moy presents the argument for relative, though is by no means, a complete relativist.

Die, Workwear! presents a piece arguing for a set taste as he is arguing that style is not relative.

It should be noted that both authors are not black and white on this issue (based off their other written pieces), and that this issue is not black and white either.

Friends

2011-02-27T19:10:00.000-08:00

After a recent medical incident, I had friends around to take care of me. Great friends aren't limitless, but if you are a kind, truthful, and happy person, you will always have the best.

DIY

2011-02-21T12:01:00.000-08:00

The linked article is an opinion from The Quietus about the DIY bedroom music scene questioning the current credibility of lo-fi music. Long article made short: lo-fi out of necessity is good. Lo-fi out of wanting something to 'feel authentic' is bad and a 'lie'.

This can be compared to pre-distressing.

I'm not arguing for either. Just take note of what pre-distressing says to others when you wear it.

Food Shield

2011-02-10T10:59:00.000-08:00

A while back, assuming you read more popular blogs than mine, you probably came across the post on Secret Forts about lightweight parkas. Parkas are great. They're waterproof, light, breathable, and super noisy when you're sneaking around. Unfortunately, people these days are rarely outside, especially style bloggers, and aren't really sure what rain is like (Is it cold? Does it hurt?), so people often don't think they need something like a parka. Not surprisingly, they're super duper wrong. Parkas are very useful in the modern age. What is a thing that everyone loves to do? Where does everyone frequent? That's right. Parkas are very useful for stuffing your pie hole at cafeterias and food courts.

Food is great. All the bubbling grease, slithering slop, dripping mayo, splattering mustard, splurting ketchup, and dribbling fat hopefully will find its way into your mouth and into your tummy. Luckily, you bought that extra large coke to wash it all down. Unfortunately, everyone sucks at eating. It must be human nature to dump half the food you try to eat onto yourself rather than into your mouth. This is where the parka comes in. A nice, water(grease)proof parka will dribble all that stuff you get on yourself off onto the floor. In this post I'll be highlighting some designs that are great for keeping that chili off your chest.

This one's really simple. It's got some great minimalist details. The pockets are handy for keeping extra ketchup packets, salt dispensers, and napkins. The drawstring hood is great for keeping the soda from splashing down your shirt.

Barbour is a well known brand. The waxed shell is superb not only for keeping food off of you, but ensuring that the grease won't stain.

Sometimes you need a bit of flair in your life. You definitely need this bit of flair in your life if you have a tendency to get mustard on yourself. The color disguises it perfectly.

Eating does have it's consequences. But with a coat that has a button front, you'll be ready. When the paramedics come with the defibrillator, they need easy access to your chest, and ripping open a coat is easier than unzipping a coat. With your coat off, just imagine how good you'll look on the gurney, with your fresh Aldens and BD shirt. If you're lucky, you'll be back, eating McDonald's apple pies in no time.

Like an good aesthete, you need a great pair of pants to go with your parka and you're in luck. MW just released some Tellason jeans that fit hefty guys and go up to size 40. How about that?

OBF

2011-01-21T11:59:00.001-08:00

Gabriel sat with God in the waiting room of the family doctor. Things had gotten weird the past few weeks. First, God had taken up calling Gabriel, 'Gabe' like he was a bro or something. This was most noticeable to Gabriel but others had pointed out new oddities God had taken up. God was currently flipping through a People magazine and retweeting all of Kanye's tweets because none of God's followers followed Kanye too. God circa three months ago would have never done this. Gabriel wasn't even sure if God had a twitter account before then. "He's so witty," God muttered to no one in particular. Maybe to his followers, if they could hear him. Looking back, the first signal that something was seriously wrong with God occurred out in the fields of clouds when God was visiting one who had gotten past the pearly gates.

Steve McQueen revved his bike through the clouds. He had been at it for 3 weeks straight, driving around on this piece of cirrus. A white bearded man in a white bespoke suit waved at him from a ways away. Steve drove over and cut the engine. God smiled as Steve looked at him from his bike. "Hey Steve. What's up?" God grinned. Gabriel stood behind God looking confused and holding a vintage rucksack with a MacBook in it. "I was wondering if I could talk to you, just for a bit," God wore a grin that would shame a cartoon cat. "Is this about the noise? God, I told those people that if they wanted me to, I'd ride on the next cloud over," Steve stammered nervously.
"No, no, no, actually, I was wondering if I could get an interview."
"A what?"
"An interview. Y'know, about the Barbour coats."
"The what?"
God looked at Steve's white racing jacket and muttered under his breath, "crispy, is that a collab?..." Then he looked up and exclaimed, "oh, well you don't know then, do you? I had assumed you had gotten the press release, but I guess they only sent that to bloggers. Well, your kid licensed your name for a Barbour coat line. They've even put your face in the lining of some of the coats." God whipped out his Mac and showed off the pictures. Steve wasn't sure what to make of this. He was dead, who cared? "Well, I mean, he own's the na-" Steve was abruptly cutoff as God's Mac made a chirping noise and God erupted into obnoxious laughter. "Gabe, Gabe, you gotta' see this video. HARHARHARHAR! Oh man, that's just outrageous!" Gabe smiled awkwardly, not really sure what God was laughing at. "Oh man, oh man, I gotta' email this to Steezus! HAHAHAHA!"
"Who?" asked Steve and Gabriel in unison.
"Y'know, Steezus. Steezus Christ."
"You mean Jesus, right?"
"Yeah, yeah, sure, Steezus, Jesus, same thing..."
"Well," Steve started, wanting this interview to end immediately, "he's my kid, and I guess he can do what he wants."
God grinned at Steve, showing off his pearly whites, and said, "Good, good, I'll post that right away. Hopefully I beat everyone to the punch."
God walked away with the computer open, posting the interview to his wordpress and tumblr, absorbing images from a new Vatican and Filson collaboration, and asking Gabriel his credit card number so he could order something from Unionmade.

The doctor looked up from his paperwork that he was filling out and asked Gabriel if he would like to step outside to talk. Gabriel obliged, leaving God to fiddle with the pockets on his sportcoat he forgot to cut open. "It's not good, " the doctor said in a hushed tone, "there are no meds out yet for this, but there are a couple things you can do that would help."
"What has he got, doc?" Gabe - I mean Gabriel - asked.
"OBF, and it's bad."
"What's OBF?"
"Obnoxious blogger fuck"
"Is it curable?"
"No, but here's what you can do. First, empty his checking account, if he doesn't have any money to blow on stuff he won't be able to talk about it on the internet. Second, tell his friends to not @GOD on his twitter. It just feeds his ego. Third, tell him he looks metrosexual every day, three times a day. God willing-" the doc paused to snicker at his own wittiness, "we should be able to keep OBF at bay for the next few years, at least until we find meds that work."
"Thanks doc," as Gabriel gathered himself and prepared for the trial that the next months would bring.
God, sitting in the examination table, thought about how the whiskers were coming in nicely on his raw denim, unaware of the changes that would be coming.

Sockless Footwear: A Menswear Blogger's History

2011-01-09T19:48:00.000-08:00

In case you didn't know, I spend a lot of time reading your posts. Yes, you, the guy who takes pictures of your shoes, shirts, coats, (hopefully not) your penis, and your watches. I have been for some time. Anyway, like anyone who reads a lot, I begin to make connections. And from those connections I present you "Sockless Footwear: A Menswear Blogger's History". Don't worry, it's quite enlightening.

Boatshoes were the shit in '08-'09. Comfortable and slightly more classy than flip-flops, you wore them to hide the fungus that grows on your toes. You wore them sockless because, well, it's what you did. You got quite a bit of mileage into them before the streetwear kids found the boatshoes in all sorts of wacky colors and totally ruined your gig. Tough, now onto new uncharted territory (oh wait, JK, it's not new at all).

You found pennyloafers in photographs archived by the LIFE website, you x'ed out of the photos of dog afterbirth you were sending your girlfriend to explain why you shouldn't have a kid, and pulled up Zappos to order a pair of Bass plastic loafers. Well, that or you saved your dough and bought a pair with real leather. While boatshoes were cool, these shoes served you better '09-'10. Mainly because the hardbottoms do not melt like rubber when you stamp out flaming bags of shit on your front porch as the jocks from your old high school roar by in their '69 Mustang and one leans out the window, yelling, "QUIT WRITING ABOUT SOCKS, YOU FUCKIN' FAIRY!" While useful for this, pennyloafers also get quite a stank from this. '10-'11, time for something new.

In your new tassle loafers, you couldn't give a shit about the flaming bags of shit on your front porch. You mortgaged your house and bought a Porsche so when you drive by the old high school jocks you can flip them off and snort the mucus back into your nose disdainfully. The leather has achieved a rotten looking patina from all the alcohol you've spilt all over them. You and your new shoes don't give a dear a damn. You've dumped your girlfriend (what kind of person says that dog afterbirth is cute?), you blow your dough on tailoring your parkas and premium gas, and you sit at home and watch PBS murder mysteries. ADG knows whats up when it comes to MYSTERY! on PBS. Wait, hear that, it's the door bell. Time to snuggle up, the UPS man is dropping off the box set of Miss Marple Murder Mysteries. Wear your tassle loafers, they're what's up for '10-'11.

Photos robbed from:
DD
IS
UP

Amongst Friends

2011-01-08T18:02:00.001-08:00

Can't say I've heard of this brand until today, and then, only by stumbling upon them via internet sale. They've probably had product featured on hypebeast but let us be honest, most of us don't follow that in the first place. Amongst Friends is a mishmash of menswear references with quality that I have no experience with and internet digging reveals little. So I don't think we're talking about handing it down to your kid's kids quality. That being said, it's nice to see what this brand did to make their product different. Some of it I've seen before, but some I haven't. Marketing to street-wear kids seems like the route they've been going, given their looks from the book. But there's no reason not to take a look, to mentally file away for later. If you're like me, documenting stuff like this is half the fun.

Denim isn't even selvedge. Pshaw! How bourgeois!

Dumb pants are dumb.

Flannel lined with chambray...

... And chambray lined with flannel! See what they did there? Wait, you've seen that before?

If it weren't for the branding, this faux hipster picture shirt (OMG IT HAS THE RAT PACK!) might make it into my closet. Actually, on second thought, naw, no it won't.

If people would learn to leave their brand off some products...
If I owned a Ferrari...

If you can't afford a Filson and like unnecessary pockets.

That's tweed, apparently.

I don't know what's wrong with the model on the left. He was posing like a doucher the entire collection. He needs a good spanking.

Garbstore

2011-01-03T10:37:00.000-08:00

Garbstore out of the UK put up their Winter Sale not too long ago. They've got that toggle vest everyone was lusting over, always have good jeans, classic and clean parkas, and plenty of other stuff up.

Check out that yoke. Something worth thinking about if your lumberjack impression is off just a hair.

Baby Boomers: The Villian?

2010-12-28T17:16:00.001-08:00

First, you should read this article from the WSJ.

If you didn't feel like reading all that, I'll sum up the character outline they provide Dr. Chris Wayne. He's a doctor who lives in Miami Beach and collected 1.2 million dollars from Medicare in 2008 mostly by providing therapy. He claims he collected it all legally, which seems reasonable as all public policy has loopholes. He is successfully painted as a villain in the article. Which brings me to my point: WSJ painted him as a villain easily because he looks like the child who didn't grow up.

He looks like he never grew up. Almost unnaturally, he dresses himself in everything from the past that he loves. Spikey hair, vintage cars, Ed Hardy sneakers (wait, is that current?), he revels in everything that he feels shows that he is still young and quite rebellious. Being of a generation that is irritated by anything "unauthentic" (I know, it's a vague term, argue with me later), I think we can all find this man enraging. He doesn't appear to have worked very hard for his money, at least any harder than a family doctor. Dr. Wayne just knows how to work the system. In an blogosphere that has a hard on for hard-working America, this is the stuff that drives us nuts.

Which brings me to my next point. The current college/entering workforce generation feels that we got screwed over as the boomer generation will be enjoying Social Security and Medicare on our overburdened shoulders. We complain that they enjoyed America as it was booming, and got good jobs and failed to continue that growth, while retiring on a broken system. To me, Dr. Wayne emcompasses the boomer generation. He appears as the perfect villain to pin these problems on. His lifestyle doesn't represent what I idolize. However, in the boomers' position, I don't doubt that we would have done the same. Maybe we just have to grin and bear our outlook (and stay so fly).

MS & Co.

2010-12-09T19:32:00.000-08:00

Did you buy a MS & Co. selvedge iPad sleeve and not own an iPad 'cause you're too broke? The good news is that you can still use your sleeve and get totally rad authentic fades. I hear there's mad respect on the blogosphere for authentic paper clip fades. Besides paperclips, I'm presenting a guide to some stuff that you can fill your sleeve with and put it to good use.

I think the most obvious thing to put in your sleeve are coins. Though the sleeve doesn't have a zipper, they probably won't fall out. And if they do, just hope that there's an attractive girl around to help you pick them up. And remember, the horse ride machine outside the grocery store is still only 50 cents. Start saving.

Those 3D glasses you got from Jackass 3D? Yea, they've been sitting in my car too. I'd throw them in the sleeve so you're not tempted to use them when driving. It makes the median look like it's in three different places.

Cookies are probably the best thing to keep in your sleeve. When you're in a meeting or in class, it's fun to eat a cookie and try to see if no one will notice. Act like you're chewing cud and people will be too grossed out to accuse you of anything. Also, the crumbs come in handy when you need a snack a few weeks later.

Most textbooks won't fit into a MS & Co. sleeve. At least you will have authentic rips.

A portfolio should fit.

And that sums it up. If you have any ideas for things to put into your iPad-less sleeve, just leave a comment, I'll be sure to add them to the list.

Parting Thoughts: A gift guide is not in order. If you haven't started Christmas shopping yet, you're in trouble.

Missed the Boat

2010-11-27T15:55:00.000-08:00

I think maybe these jackets by Woolrich missed the boat. Probably because they were faddy only a couple years ago. Parkas have been missing the distinctive lining at the hood for the past few seasons. You could say that it makes sense, as this fur lining seems more luxurious than practical.

Back in the day, Woolrich used to make a lot of these parkas. The Europeans loved them, but with the global warming fad catching on, their sales dropped. You can't order them off Woolrich's website. Ebay is probably your best bet.

Why the blogosphere doesn't love these is a bit of a mystery.

Rappers love anything exotic around their neck, woman or animal. "The Crew" love rappers ('specially Big Boi). I should see a coat like this in my blogroll at least twice a day. Does not compute.

Italians loved them. Looks like this Italian lost his parka a while back. I guess it explains why his sportcoat is longer than his puffy bomber.

"The Crew" loves Italians. I would've expected to see the "retro Italian" fad rolling around already.

Does anyone remember 13th & Wolf? The dude knew where it was at.

My only explanation for all this is that "The Crew" is actually PETA. Makes a whole 'lotta sense, actually.

JK.

Real reason: Have you ever seen someone shoveling horse shit in a coat like this? Neither have I.

Pictures robbed from:
sumbro?
13th & Wolf
The Internet

What Went Wrong?

2010-11-08T16:29:00.000-08:00

Let's take a theoretical world. Everyone dresses in a uniform 1984 style. None of this personal style crap, just clean cut. Take American individualism and the desire to consume differently than others out of it. Everyone eats the same food, wears the same briefs, and wakes up at the same time every morning. Then, out of somewhere awesome, someone starts to do things differently. Underwear is put on backwards, cookies are for breakfast, and said person rolls out of bed at noon; just in time to miss the staff meeting.

Unfortunately, this is not where menswear has come from the past few years. Uniforms? They're out the window. Individualism? It's rampant to the point of bad taste.

Collections tend to want to progress with the male. They take him from his basics one season, onto the stripes and patterns the next. They seem to be trying to help him build his style. Here's the problem. People buy individually, and buy into the advanced seasons, thus missing the point of actually building the basics. JCrew falls into this problem this season.

Credits to SF

Awkward three button or 3/2 roll jackets (they're loosely ironed, meaning that you should be individual and unkept), tuxedo orphans, and silly hipster hoodies abound.

All this? All this would be great if menswear were coming from that theoretical world described above. As mentioned previously, it's not. It's coming from a world where men wore whatever they wanted. And now if they wear a collar, it's quite the step up. Dressing like Frank suggests isn't much more individual than wearing flippy flops and a trucker hat. Sprezzatura is not going from Threadless t-shirts to undone french cuffs flopping around your wrists. It's not mismatching a tuxedo jacket with your pants. It's not throwing a bunch of crap together because the male should be an individual.

Brands like JCrew need to spend time perfecting the basics. It's not going to happen after one season. It'll probably take five.

Maybe menswear needs to spend some time in North Korea.

FYMW

2010-11-02T19:42:00.000-07:00

Fuckyeahmenswear is funny. There is no doubt. I didn't want to write this but I feel that people don't quite get it. Is it his/her/it's/Maurice's hip-hop references? Is it how he/she/it/Maurice knows menswear better than your average tumblr ass clown? Sarcasm? His/her/it's/Maurice's corruptions of Bastian and Cucinelli? Is it that he/she/it/Maurice makes fun of our ridiculousness?

It's not.

It's funny because FYMW so subtly strokes our ego.

People love inside jokes. It makes them feel included. Do you know the difference between a Danner and a Bean Boot? Good, then you're in. By poking fun at menswear, FYMW assures us of our presence. He/she/it/Maurice builds our ego by tearing us down. Like when your best friends rag on you for being a character, or for being unique, FYMW does the same thing.

People seem to think that FYMW is so great because it makes us introspective and cast off our absurdities. The former is true, but there is a secondary effect to this introspection and it is not that we cast off our absurdities. It makes us believe that our preposterousness is actually a good thing. Few menswear bloggers/readers are in 7th grade, the last thing we want to is to fade into the background. We revel in our quirks.

We love ourselves so much.

Love Me Tender

2010-10-26T15:15:00.000-07:00

Another brand outta' the UK? Whatever, this brand goes hard for locomotion references. Trains? Cool in my book. I'm all for Obama's reinvest in America program as long as we get lots of cool trains. I'd pay extra taxes for that (and have less dough to blow on oxfords). However, I suggest that we should put a clause in the act requiring all new trains to get Thomas the Tank Engine faces. That way America can be just like the Island of Sodor. As it should be.

Wait, hold on. That lining? Look familiar? Yep, here. They must share mills.

Get your train on. My prediction? #trainwear2011

Emil over at Denim Debate will be trying a pair of Tenders. Excited to see the first fits.

Wankerchief

2010-10-25T18:24:00.000-07:00

With the utilization of the internet for menswear, learning how to dress is as easy as looking up whether or not Jeanne Tripplehorn was in Waterworld or not (she is, in fact). We've learned how to tie a bow-tie, buy a suit that fits, and get great fades on a pair of selvedge denim (to non-selvedge heads, selvedge jeans are like legos. They're fun 'cause of the process). The internet is democratized style by instructing every man to rock their inner badass/womanizer. Of course, we've seen a resurgence in a number or timeless trends. One of them being the wankerchief.

Originating in England, when gentlemen were in the doghouse after too much to drink, the wankerchief was created to keep yourself clean. It should also be mentioned that the phrase, "CHECK YO' SELF" also took root here, as a reminder to your friend that he needs to clean himself before he leaves the house. No one needs to see that.

Recently, the wankerchief was reintroduced into menswear. Many place their selvedge, it shows wear better and lets people know how lived in and authentic you are, wankerchiefs in their back jean pocket (also selvedge for ultimate authentic results).

While wankerchiefs are often utilitarian, some used them for decorative purposes. Here we see Sinatra stunting the wankerchief folded in his breast pocket. Purely decorative as Frank Sinatra never had any wanking to do. He was Frank Sinatra.

Contrast Sinatra's wankerchief with the wankerchief sticking out of the back pocket of this pair of jeans. You can see it's a heavily used wankerchief. You'll get some crazy cool fades on that wankerchief in a year or two with all the use it's getting.

Here we see Will from ASW using the wankerchief decoratively. Good to know that he uses his decoratively, otherwise that would be gross. He's kinda' old.

The internet has re-popularized the wankerchief which is good news for everyone. Before you leave said wanking area, you should always use your wankerchief to "CHECK YO' SELF". I can't imagine the 90s when no young men used wankerchiefs. Barbarians.

Wankerchiefs are great for those who need to clean the spoog off themselves after making parody posts that all seem the same. It helps if you use the same words every time.

Doin' Manly Stuff in Uggs

2010-10-17T14:50:00.000-07:00

Uggs, sensing a trend in men's boots, gives us a line for doing super manly stuff in. It's a line that I'm super excited about and I can't wait to get my hands on a pair.

The marketing campaign is quite appealing, though I can't find an ad scan. Most ads have men lounging outside, near chopped wood with the script, "It's a man thing" plastered under the model. Quite appealing, as all men like doing man things.

This picture from the Ugg website is pretty manly. Boots and chopped wood makes me feel like I have balls, and that women will desire me more.

This is a really cool model. With all that fur at the ankle opening you can do manly things like go to the mall and watch TLC.

If those first boots don't provide you with enough ankle support you can go with these. You can do even more manly things in these like bake chocolate chip cookies. But they have to be gluten free, your mother-in-law is allergic.

These slip-on driving mocs are great, just fantastic looking shoes for doing manly things while keeping it low cut. I would imagine that these are the perfect shoes for doing manly things like painting ceramics and eating veggie burgers.

If putting on a shoe is too hard for you, you can always go with a clog. I think this is the ultimate man shoe for doing manly things. The fur is still there, making sure that you stay comfy while you leave your bedroom to make hotpockets on a Wednesday afternoon. You can do every imaginable manly thing in these: listen to Meg & Dia, read the Oprah magazine, sell your Beanie Babies on ebay, and talk about your period on the internet.

This collection is the coolest thing I've seen on the blogosphere in a few months because, y'know, "it's a man thing".

Natural Selection

2010-10-08T07:56:00.000-07:00

Natural Selection is a brand out of the UK that's selling consumers the workwear aesthetic. They've got the typicals: selvedge, workwear shirts, selvedge chinos with lots of buttons for suspenders and side cinches, three button jackets, and some graphic tees for the kids. Availability in the states? None that I found, but I'd like to take a look at it anyway... so I can complain about it.

The most important thing about selling a workwear brand, is to make sure your model is a stoic dude. I mean, they're representing the proletariat. They're still waiting to rise up and abolish capital. Power to the people, yo.

Pretty standard. He's a little more happy in this one. But that's because he's working with wood, and wood makes everyone happy. Look at the size of the v-patch! That dude must sweat lakes!

"That hole in the wall? Yeah, it used to be the crematorium. The dust makes great fertilizer. You should pick up gardening, it would further push your workwear aesthetic."

"See these chinos? They're selvedge. That means they're... that mean they're... well, they have tape... and... and I'm standing by a chair."

I really can't lie, the stuff doesn't look terrible on the rack. The three button jacket actually looks quite scrumtuous. The washed selvedge is a no can do for me, but I'm sure some people like their denim washed out. It's not a huge collection, but it seems fairly repetitive. There's some nice stuff here, but unless the price point undercuts the competition, there's no real reason to take a look.

Budget Turtle Neck

2010-10-05T10:02:00.000-07:00

Gap fills the affordable Turtleneck gap with this guy. $50 and you'll be looking sharp with this under a flannel shirt, tweed blazer, or suit jacket. They've got grey and black, though grey is the more versatile of the two. Of course, it's Gap, and you get what you pay for. Don't expect merino wool of Brooks Brothers or JPress quality. Gap claims it's 100 percent merino wool (which is probably true), but I'm sure it won't feel like that when you try it on. If turtlenecks aren't your game and you want to see if they can be, without dropping more than $90, this would be your best bet.

Look @ What I'm Wearing

2010-09-30T13:09:00.000-07:00

I don't get good vibes from this.

Seems like a lame marketing tool.

I don't know how this promotes the Gant brand; I guess constant exposure to the website by uploading your outfits in which people can comment how douchey you look.

You get free mp3s to apply to your outfits, which is worth as much as toilet paper.

Also, you've got to connect via facebook, letting know people that you actually care about how you look, which to some, is less than desirable.

I think they gave Brennan Woods @ thepursuitaesthetic.com some free stuff. Will I get some free stuff for posting about this? Probably not.

Oh, wait. I can get free mp3s to apply to my outfits. Woopie.

I kind of wish that brand marketing would take a chill pill. I feel that the less a brand tries to be cute about their marketing, the more I'm attracted to the brand. I can make my own decisions. I don't need to upload 'outfits' via facebook (I do that on blogger... pause). I was attracted to the Gant brand, until now. This is just lame. My money will be taken elsewhere.

Grown Up Silly Bandz

2010-09-28T10:16:00.001-07:00

In case you haven't heard, the kids are ragin' about silly bandz. So much so, that people have produced some music to promote the brand.

Next time you need a bumpin' tune for your next party, you can thank me.

Now trendsetters are adult-inizing silly bandz as they show off their man jewelry as if to say, "I may be 34, but I can accessorize better than a 11 year old girl." Tailors are including working sleeve buttons on jackets, invented so dudes can roll their sleeves to show off their collection of adult silly bandz.

This guy is super silly steezy. Look at all those adult silly bandz. I'm not sure why he hasn't unbuttoned his jacket sleeves. Maybe they're not working button holes, like many jacket button holes pre-adult silly bandz fad.

Poor guy only has one adult silly band. If you've got a couple extra, maybe you could lend them to this guy.

This guy brings new meaning to "get silly".

Photos via giltmanual and someplaceidontremember.

Remember folks. Stay relevant and get lots and lots of adult silly bandz. Fake Rolex dealers will thank you.

An Indian Bummer

2010-09-23T11:42:00.000-07:00

Second day of fall? Long sleeves are getting left at home. Hell, jeans are pushing it. We can't wait to preview the flannel, but all good things have their time. Come February, I'm going to be wondering why I was in such a hurry to wear sweaters.

Go short sleeve with a thrifted Eddie Bauer seersucker shirt. Did this see a tailor? Naw, all those tight fitting clothes tend to do a lousy job of regulating your body temperature. I'm not swimming in it via trad style, but it's no SE fit.

Fresh jeans and hat. Gotta' keep it clean for the first few weeks of school.

John Rawls: great philosopher, confusing writer.

Socks might have been a bit much today as it nears 90.

"You gotta' take notes."

The Silliest of Pants

2010-09-21T09:06:00.001-07:00

You've seen this image before. Gant and MB s/s '11, right? It's based off of Marilyn Monroe's husbands. One of them being Joe DiMaggio, who probably inspired these pants with baseball bats embroidered on them. They're not bad, but I do have one problem with them. DiMaggio probably would have never worn them. When worn by a non-ball player, they're wimsical. When worn by a ball player, they're tacky and boastful. Do others wear their profession on their sleeve? Usually not. Do you see doctors wearing ties referencing their profession? Actually, sometimes you see pediatricians wearing ties with stethescopes on them, but they're the silliest of doctors.

Don't wear your profession on your sleeve. If people want to know that, they'll ask you.

Sidenote: If you're a pediatrician and are under the impression that you aren't silly, you're reading this, which means that you are quite silly.

Dress Shirts

2010-09-09T08:17:00.000-07:00

People new to the game of wearing a tie have it wrong. Well, they're wearing a tie right, but it's about the shirt. Casual shirts DO NOT WORK. Casual shirts are meant to be worn without a tie. They typically have floppy collars, and are fitted in S,M,L, which results in an inappropriate sleeve length and TERRIBLE collar fit. The collar is bound to be too big (not often the case for those with fitted shirts) or too small (I see this a whole lot more).

Because the collar doesn't fit, we see a lot of kids rocking the loose tie... before hours. This is blaspheme. This results in looking affected, and reminds me of walking about with your fly down. The tie comes loose after hours bro, when your date is so hot you can't handle it (well, maybe not, but we can wish).

Also, S,M,L dress shirts can be the downfall of many a folk. The fit is typically off and even if the collar is stiff, it won't look as clean cut as you would hope. Know your collar size and know your sleeve length, then hit up Lands End, Brooks Brothers, or LL Bean to find a shirt that fits.

Sidenote: To all those 'skinny' guys out there, you won't swim in a LL Bean slim fit or a Land's End tailored fit, BoO has just trained you to think so. Tuck your shirt in, and you'll see how amazing a LL Bean or Land's End oxford can be.

Sidenote 2: GQ has more info here.

Rolex? More like Borelex

2010-09-06T10:29:00.000-07:00

Spend all you want trying to find vintage Rolexes 'cause they totally reflect your vintage and hard working personality, this guy won't be throwing out the dough for that (until a real salary comes about, of course).

When I wear my dirt cheap Casio I'm channeling the:
"Oh, baby, are you into nerds? No? Damn."
"Dominos doesn't offer the 555 deal anymore?"
"I was considering plastic, but this cheap metal looks so much more classy"
"I blacked-out and lost my watch. Get over it."
"Actually, my mother does have several pink flamingos in her lawn." vibe.

If you fit any of these vibes, then this watch might just be for you.

When I wear this watch, I get so excited I shake.

You can skip lunch and order it here.

Friends Got Yo' Back

2010-09-03T12:33:00.000-07:00

Thrifting is something I spend a decent amount of time doing. I'm usually collecting old BB ties or digging through old men's belts and shoes (finding AE shoes in 9s rather than 10s drives me bonkers). Knowing labels always helps. Last semester I took my roommate for one of my scavenging trips and he picked up the gist of what's good and what's worthless. Over the summer, his grandfather was cleaning out his closet and gave a bunch of his stuff for my roommate to root through. My roommate didn't fit into any of it, but he picked up this Lacoste/Izod sweatshirt for me.

It surprisingly fits very well for a large. Snug but not tight, it fits exactly like I want my sweatshirts to fit like. It looks super sharp with an oxford or polo. I'm guessing it's an 80s sweatshirt as research turned up nothing. Y'all can go around spending mad dough on finding the "perfect sweatshirt" (and on that note I would like to add that finding a perfect sweatshirt is dumb. It's a sweatshirt, not a suit) but I'll get mine for free.

Edit: Uber-prep sweatshirts or bust for this guy.

This all being said, I didn't just show you this sweatshirt to tell you how homo my relationship with my roommate is, but to show you how sometimes dressing well is about being a community. One good turn will always result in another. When it comes to thrifted clothes, don't just remember yourself: remember your friends, remember your siblings, and remember that helping each other out can be easy on your wallet.

Sidenote: I went back through old posts. I can't believe how bad the layout looked. Ew.

Sidenote 2: Dear Jake Davis, more lovely ladies in menswear. PLZ.

Sidenote 3: GQ, bums use roller luggage, not classy gentlemen.

3Sixteen Camp Hat

2010-09-02T06:39:00.000-07:00

3Sixteen doesn't really need anyone tooting their horn. They've successfully marketed their brand into the hearts of a wide range of denim enthusiasts and oxford junkies. So maybe this is a thank you note that never got into the mail.

I'm a sucker for ball caps. Sartorialists all over can bemoan the decline of culture that the ball cap has brought upon us, but being a college student, a full brimmed hat or a driver's hat looks contrived and reminiscent of that kid who tried to bring them back in high school. I'll make a metaphor for you. If a driver's hat or full brimmed hat is the cherry on the top of the ice cream sunday, then you'll need a solid bunch of ice cream and syrup beneath it. I'm a college student, I don't wear suits (often), I don't wear long overcoats, and I'm not dressing in that ice cream sunday style. Casually, (i.e. when I'm not wearing a blazer) I'll throw a ball cap on as it feels and looks right.

Camp caps have gotten a revival from streetwear brands as an alternative to those flat brimmed monstrosities. When I picked up a patterned polar fleece camp cap from Durkl last winter, I was hooked as it quickly became my winter go to over my Filson tin cloth ball cap. I picked these two as alternatives as they're certainly less peacocky. After taking the rip-stop canvas green cap for a few test drives, I've gotta' say: these are some well made hats.

So, thanks 3Sixteen, they're dope.

University Stripe: First Days of School

2010-08-24T15:13:00.000-07:00

LL Bean has restocked the online shop and is once again offering the University Stripe. It's not in trim fit, so size down. I don't mind billowy shirts, well, semi-billowy shirts (just as long as my nips are out for everyone to see, but you already knew that). If you're wearing a blazer and you tuck your shirt in, the billowy-ness is cut down. Because of the extra room, I'd say that regular fit shirts are more comfortable than fitted shirts and end up looking fine with a trim jacket and pants.

I had a LL Bean university stripe purchased for my first year of boarding school. It was red like the picture. I was pretty proud of it because it seemed to go with every tie I owned and I could occasionally get away with it on school tie/white shirt/green blazer school days. Sometime that fall, I was wearing my white oxford and I saw my Korean roommate, called David, wearing a red university stripe oxford. I knew he didn't own a red university stripe oxford. We didn't talk and certainly didn't get along. David played dating simulators, didn't wear deodorant, and screamed loudly when he lost Starcraft. There were weeks where I wouldn't hear him speak English. It's a shame really, as it seemed all the other Korean students got along with us Americans and would even speak English amongst themselves. Bad egg, I suppose. He was good friends with the other Koreans but they would make fun of him and tell us that his mother paid for his education by whoring herself out, which we found entertaining. I checked my drawers later that day and couldn't find my university stripe.

I asked David about it that night after cross-country practice. He acted like he couldn't understand English, even though he understood how to tell people to "fuck off". Frustrated, when I had a free period the next day, I went through his drawers. I couldn't find my shirt anywhere. I never saw my university stripe oxford again. He certainly didn't wear it. David dropped out at the end of the year and I never saw him again. Since I'm ordering a new one, here's to you David, I hope life is treating you well and I hope your mom isn't actually a whore.

Fox River

2010-08-22T14:08:00.000-07:00

Made outta' corn?

I guess my old socks just weren't eco-friendly enough.

Expanding Markets

2010-08-20T17:18:00.000-07:00

Americana and a general interest investing in timeless pieces has been successfully marketed to the American male. Lines like LL Bean Signature and Lands End Canvas have been well recieved. Now it is has come time for this trend to expand to other markets. I believe Alex Carleton, who makes variations on the iconic bean boot for LL Bean Signature, has started the exploration of a very niche market with the release of this black leather bean boot.

Sexual deviants have paid women dressed in black leather to whip them for sometime now. Of course, since this has been popular amongst those looking for something else in their sexual lives, dominatrixes's gear has begun to wear out. Much like the American male, dominatrixes want to invest in a black leather piece that will last them for sometime. Now I don't have anyway to know this for sure, but it appears to me that this black boot was intended to market the Americana trend to dominatrixes. It's perfect for their line of work as it's rubber and waterproof (I don't have to tell you what they need waterproof boots for), has a bit of a heel which makes the woman more dominating than if she weren't, and it's black: the dominatrixes color of choice.

Of course, to me, I feel as though this is the beginning of the end of our beloved Americana trend. With others not in our 'bro' group buying the same things we do, we will feel we are losing our identity and may feel as though we our beginning to be associated with dominatrixes (assuming they pick up on LL Bean Signature's boot offering). Like any sane man, I sure as heck don't want to be associated with these sexual deviants.

Alex Carleton is walking a very fine line here. He must not alienate his current customers while expanding upon his profits. I sure don't want to fight over a pocket flap oxford with a dominatrix in a JCrew store (but it's marked down to $29.99!).

#keepdominatrixesoutofjcrew

Steeze-dar

2010-08-18T17:28:00.000-07:00

Coolest show on TV? Not Mad Men or Breaking Bad, This Old House hands down. Stuntin' chambray, chaimos, flannel, oxford, and denim, these guys know whats up.

In this episode, the dudes show you how to set up your digital receiver for your TV. I thought everyone stopped using basic cable 4 decades ago. Guess not.

Is that a purple mole cloth workshirt? I think it is.

These guys look better than HGTV hosts even when hungover from the weekend. How much product do they use in their hair? Looks like none. How much shit was given about how their tan looks on camera? Looks like none. How much furniture from IKEA do these guys have in their own homes? Looks like none.

This is the American man show. Tuck your shirt in and comb your hair for Christ's sake, ya' look like a slob.

Back from the Tailor

2010-08-17T16:47:00.000-07:00

Picked my pants from the tailor today, after quite a period without them. In general, they turned out okiedokie. Here's what they looked like before the tailor got ahold of them.

The gray chino turned out a tad short. No break, but with some shoes, like low sneakers, you can see the sock when I'm standing. Luckily, they're shoes that I normally wear without socks. Also, the opening is tapered down to 15" which I've decided is just a bit too faddy for me. I think I'll stick with 16" next time.

These khaki chinos are just about what I want. They're tapered from 17" down to 16". There's a bit of a break, but there's nothing wrong with that. They're khakis, so if I'm really bothered, I can always cuff them.

For $16 a pair, not too bad at all. Then considering what I paid for the pants, it's a steal.

Bad Taste?: Same ol' same ol'

2010-08-16T20:50:00.000-07:00

Another McNairy collab surfaced this year. Walk-Over wanted in on the game and got the buck revivalist to inject some life in the brand. Looking at the collection. It's the same old, same old. Boring right? Feel like you've seen it before? For a second or two this bothered me. It seemed boring. We've seen all this already, why can't anyone come out with something new. But isn' that what Americana is about? While the Walk-Over collection looks like any other McNairy collab, it's Americana, so it shouldn't look new. Americana is more about ho-hum than sham-wow.

Socks? Summer? Blaspheme.

2010-08-13T13:20:00.000-07:00

No-show socks? Ridiculous. Boat shoes are worn without socks. This is what the hardcore topsidet would say (think cadet, but topsider wearing). Of course, not everyone can perscribe to this. Unfortunate, no? I've worn Sperry's and have never had a problem. When my pair from boarding school blew out, I snatched a brand new pair of Bass boat shoes off ebay for the price of a pack of those no-show socks.

They're very similar, but slightly different. My feet don't notice a difference because Sperry's never bothered my feet, but I understand that they give some people blisters. Now a lot of people get blisters on their heel from the way Sperry's are made. Sperry's don't have a solid heel, and it will have a tendency to grab the heel when you walk. Now my Bass boatshoes, they have a solid heel that I have found doesn't grab my heel when I walk. So, if you've had problems with your Topsiders, might I suggest finding a different boat shoe. It's in almost all cases more expensive then buying no show socks, but for those sockless enthusiasts, it's worth a shot. Unfortunately, I've looked all over the Bass website and cannot find what these were called back in the day. Bass doesn't seem to be offering them anymore. If I were in the market for a new pair of boat shoes, I would take my time to look around. I might find a subtle change in another brand's model that really makes the shoe.

Sidenote: GTBT is finally putting up original media? I don't see any pigs flying but...